A
female
age
51-59,
*crambled mind
writes:Last month I discovered on my partners computer whilst he was at work that he had joined a swinging site upset and confussed i decided to join myself to view his profile once i found him I became heartbroken as his relationship status was single and bi curious we have been together for 4 years and have a child together i havent said anything to him as im scared of losing him but im desperate to say something iv been checking the site daily to try catch him logged in today i finally did his been speaking to another man who his planning on meeting how far can i let this go before i tell him i know or should i let it continue i love him dearly his my world we had made plans for us to move in together but since his join his having second thourghts tells me that he has to be certain about living together im scared he's going to meet this man and forget me and his child. What should i do?
View related questions:
at work, heartbroken, swinging Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (8 April 2010):
 I agree with Basschick, you never knew this side of the equation. But cheating is cheating and are you willing to turn a blind eye to it? I think you just need to take a really deep breath and have a nice sit down chat with your partner.
A
female
reader, scrambled mind +, writes (8 April 2010):
scrambled mind is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for the 2 quick replys, very different views which is the state of my head at the moment. i have said to him whats your views on 3somes and he seemed interesed, i then said what if the guy wants you he didnt reply. thing is i cant keep doing it this way in case he thinks im into 3sums and i get myself into a situation i dont want to be in. i cant tell him but i cant not say anything
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2010): We'll normally I would have assumed that he'd joined just to read ads and get off on the photos- however, if he's corresponding with a guy, I'd probably have to confront him, and see what he says. Clearly you know what he's written...
If it turns out that he's bi, and interested in sex with me, you need to keep in mind that you two have a child together and regardless of what happens between you two, you'll need to preserve the relationship with your child, so he's going to be part of your life in some way for a long time...
...............................
A
female
reader, Basschick  +, writes (8 April 2010):
 You mind as well tell him the jig is up and put all the cards on the table. Your marriage has been a bit of a lie in my opinion because he has another side to himself you didn't know about until now. You may love him but you're actually in love with the illusion of who you thought he was. The truth is much different. You can't sit quiet any more. He needs help so have a good marriage counselor available and start sessions if he's open to the idea. And that is only if he's interested in going. If not, you will have no choice but to let him go and start the healing process for yourself and your child.
...............................
|
