A
female
age
30-35,
*asminandangels
writes:Well my boyfriend was showing me this video the other day , the music video from fifth harmony called work. He said I look a bit like Camila cebelo , and I said thanks (she's really pretty if you guys have seen her!) anywaysyyyy he said to me that will be me in five years. I asked him what he meant by in ''five years' and he said she definitely looks older than me (even though she's only 19, but he never knew this) anyway I don't think she looks that much older than me, he said she looks about 25, and me myself I'm 22. Anyways I've felt really depressed about him saying that all day for some reason. It's made me feel like he's saying I'm not as hot as her but one day I will be (in five years) he has kept saying to me he don't mean that , he means she looks older than me. I've said to him in the past I'm scared of losing my looks as I get older , so he said that he was also tryna show me some girls get even hotter as they get older. Was he saying what I think he was saying ? Keeps going over my head and made me feel upset so need some advice please p.s he said he was tryna make me happy and any girl would be happy with that and I'm just depressing myself
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2016): oh dear you took his compliment the worst possible way.
Why focus on your paranoia about looks ?
He will think you are a mindless bimbo who needs three hours of reassurance if your hem slips!
What happened to intelligent ol charming ol you?
give the guy z break and stop fussing.
what if he secretly worries his balls are too big or too small and he hates his right toenail?
oh what will you do when you find out!
give the guy a smile and talk music!
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (30 June 2016):
 Your poor fella, he gives you a compliment and says you look like her only younger and somehow you managed to take the negative from it, imagine if he pointed to a telly tubby and said hey this looks like you? Wonder how you would take that? You will push your boyfriend away if you keep up this behavior, there must be a reason why you are so uptight about your looks, why are you so self conscious? It is possible that you may need to see a therapist, you need to see that people are not based on what they look like, and also getting old is a gift not something to worry about.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (30 June 2016):
 You are depressing yourself and I think you should get counselling; you shouldn't be scared of losing your looks when you're older when you're only 22 - you shouldn't even be thinking about it and, if you do, you should realise that looks are so valuable that you need to be afraid of grating older. You prioritise looks too much.Please seek counselling for your insecurities because you'll chase your boyfriend away and be obsessed with your looks. Right now, he can't "win" even when he's giving you an obvious compliment.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (30 June 2016):
 Maybe do you have big insecurities about your hotness degree ,that make you give such a peculiar, twisted reading to what is so clearly a compliment ?
Frankly I am surprised that you may interpret it as an insult, because really what your bf said does not leave much room for interpretataion.
He said that Camilla looks like you ( or you look like her ), only SHE looks older than you ( regardless of her actual birthdate ). It makes sense that in a few years you will look just like she looks now.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2016): I hate to think what you'd take a proper insult like if that upset you because as far as I can see he complimented you. By telling you you look like some extremely pretty person but YOUNGER shouldn't be taken as an insult at all. I don't get why it's made you feel like this. Nobody wants to be told 'you look like her but older', looking older than you are is not a good thing.
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A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (30 June 2016):
 I agree with him.
I don't see the insult here.
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