Can you help me sort out this relationship so I can save it?

A female age 41-50, *odeladylee writes:

Hi, I'm new here, and desperate for help. I met my guy close to 1yr ago, when I started my latest job. We became friends, and it eventually deepened into intimate friendship. We started a relationship. Trouble is, I had practically no interest in relationships prior to this, so I had no exposure to the ways of relationships. I'd only dated casually twice b4 I turned 26! Now I was sure I wouldn't want to marry, but I met Henry and everything changed cos I fell in love with his person. Suddenly I wanted to get married, have his children, etc. We had our share of issues, but things pretty much went along until last month. We had an issue based on trust. We worked it out, and two days later, in the evening, I tried calling him, but no response. I sent him messages, but no reply. I was upset, puzzled, and wondering why he wouldn't pick my calls. So, by way of testing, I used another line to call him. It was then he picked the call. I refused to answer, but cut the line. He then called my own number. I answered, he asked did i call with a different no, I said no(was still trying to test, so I lied, planning to get to the bottom of the matter before admitting the truth). Alas, I'd called him before with the number, the plan backfired. I was at fault, I tried to explain the reason behind my actions, but he felt I just lied to him for the fun of it. He didn't speak to me in two weeks. He said he needed time to think, and I understood how hurt and disappointed he was, so I gave him space. After this, he called, and I asked his forgiveness. He said no one's perfect and he forgives. But our communication reduced drastically after this. I complained to him, and he said it's cos he now found it difficult to talk to me. I resigned myself to this, and the worst happened. He came over with a friend. He'd made it clear that it was at his friend's instance, not his, that he came. An argument began, him against his friend, unfortunately I shared his friend's view. I made a couple comments and kept quiet, he later said it's a shame I couldn't even back him up. I felt terrible, and since then, he has refused to communicate with me. That day, he complained to his friend about my not going to church, and said I'll see how far our relationship goes because of this. We don't live together. He sent a message that he's not angry, just worried. I actually am not experienced in relationships, and now I think maybe I wasn't ready for marriage. Now he doesn't answer my calls or even talk to me. I want to try and redeem this, please advise me?

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A female reader, codeladylee  +, writes (29 July 2008):

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A female reader, Just a friend  +, writes (23 July 2008):

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