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female
,
anonymous
writes: Is there an age too young to get married by other peoples' perspective? Just wondering :) Reply to this Question
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female
reader, aida_arafat +, writes (22 May 2006):
Well generaly there is no wrong age if you just know what you're doing and have marriage skills and are ready. I mean I'm 18 and I'm getting married on my 19th birthday .
A
female
reader, matron +, writes (21 May 2006):
 Hi, When you are ready for marriage and committment you will know. Most people aim to do lots of different things before they settle down such as travel, others cant wait to be all mumsy and housewifey and jump in with the first proposal. Age doesn't really apply, i married at 23 and it ended 15yrs later my friend married at 17 and it's still going strong 31yrs on, so it depends on the individuals and the way they enter the marriage. I rate trust and respect within a relationship very highly without them its downhill all the way.
Hope this has been helpful. lolx
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2006): i believe that you can be too young because you may have all the good intentions and the love but don't have the skills to make a marriage work. theres always going to be hard times in a marriage and without the skills to deal with them you'll marriage will fail.
i was planning to get married when i was 18 and i'm glad i'm not, i'm too young, i was already but my ex wasn't tho he was saying how he wanted to. but when our relationship got a little hard he left.
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A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (21 May 2006):
 I kinda agree with the bunny. There is no right or wrong age for marriage (just take a look at the number people who hurdle through life with marriage after marriage to see that!). The problem with marrying young is that you won't generally have the financial/ career security that older people do as you maybe still in education or climbing on the work ladder. You might not have the financial resources to get a nice home, pay for furniture and all that boring stuff that comes with marriage. If you have kids young, that is another financial stress. I am not saying it cannot work, but when you have added stress on top of the fact that you are having to adapt to being part of a married couple on a daily basis then it is not an ideal situation for many young people. I know that many of the girls I went to school with who married early and had children in their teens and early 20's have become a bit resentful of what they missed out on now they are in their 30's. When I was out clubbing, they were changing nappies and a few of them have strayed from their marriage in the pursuit of their 'missed youth' sadly. As a happily married lady, I can say that marriage can be really, really good when you meet the right person. But it is harder to tell if you have met the right person when you are young. I personally kissed a lot of frogs before I found my prince at 32...pass the sick bucket ;-)
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2006): Well generally, age is associated to maturity - though I utterly and completely, and of course, absolutely disagree. I believe that it neither is wrong nor right as to WHEN to get married. It's more like why you're getting married. If the reasons pertaining is based SOLELY on what two people feel is 'love' (in quotations because 'love' is I think misrepresented nowadays), then I would say no, don't do it based SOLELY on love.
Marriage should be more. As you can see, most countries do not dictate a couple's lifestyle, just because they're married. However, marriage should mean more than just having a certificate of marriage and suddenly there's hubby and wifey. In other words, unless you're a conservative religious person, marriage isn't quite 'needed' in terms of being together.
[ponders]
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A
female
reader, chunky_monkey +, writes (21 May 2006):
I disagree. Everyone is different and so is their relationships. I know people that have been married since they were young and still the happiest couple you know. Its is a know fact that first loves are designed to last because you tend to grow up around them. In the end its your decision when you should marry, because you know yourself best.
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A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (21 May 2006):
 Indeed yes! Oh yes. Indeed.
I should tell you straightaway that I'm 44 years old, married, divorced and happily remarried, so I know what I'm talking about.
My first marriage was at age 17, and it was the biggest mistake of my life. I married my psychotic first husband because he was the first man who paid attention to anything I thought or said. To me at that age, that was "love". I was too young and ignorant to realise that it was a ruse. Marriage, to him, was a means to an end, a way to control someone.
When he asked me to marry him, I was so innocent that I didn't even realise it was possible to say "no" to a question like that, so I said yes.
So what I'm getting around to saying is that the late teens are too, too young to get married. I believe that making the Age of Majority a legal marriage age is a holdover from previous generations' fear of out-of-wedlock babies, and nothing more. It doesn't make sense for people to get married when they've barely finished adolescence! You've not yet developed as an adult and you don't have any experience dealing with the world yet in adult terms. You can't possibly know or predict the kind of interests you'll have in ten years' time, so how can you pick a spouse? Making a decision to live and procreate with someone else at 17 or 19 or 21 is far more difficult than deciding on a lifelong career -- and how many of us change jobs between the ages of 20 and retirement?
With what I've learned about myself in the past few decades, I wouldn't want to see anyone take a marital oath until their mid-20s... at least.
You asked for my opinion, and that's what I've given.
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