A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:How can you be happy and have fun in life without having friends? Is it possible?I've always been kind of a loner, and I don't really know what to do with my free time. I feel really lonely and I feel like you have to have friends to be happy in life. I feel like a lot of people these days are just not worth being friends with because they cause a lot of drama and talk behind your back and stuff, this is just from my own personal experience. Is it unhealthy to be a loner? Do you have any opinions on how I can be happy and have fun by myself? Can someone relate to this and tell me about their own personal experiences? Thanks. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Glacier  +, writes (15 May 2013):
Well, I'm a loner and can certainly also be lonely at the same time, mainly when there's no gf in my life. So being a loner and being lonely doesn't have to be mutually exclusive.
I actually just started volunteering which gets me out there and might help me get a gf.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (15 May 2013):
 If you feel lonely then you really aren't cut out to be a loner. Loners ENJOY being alone, they prefer it. You just need to find the right kind of friend(s). And you find them by doing exactly what KC suggests. Figure out what activities you really enjoy doing and then get involved. You will find and meet people who share your interests. The last thing you need is to mope around the house being lonely.
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A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (15 May 2013):
 I guess I wouldnt call myself a loner, but then again I'm not the sort to have loads of friends or spend much time with friends.
I fill my time with hobbies - my main one is horses so despite working full time during the week, I ride 4 times a week (I have a horse that I share) and then on weekend mornings I work at a dressage yard to get a bit of extra cash and be around horses more. I meet lots of people through the horses, there are many people on the yard where my horse is kept so I get to interact socially with these people - I wouldnt really call them friends though and I wouldnt make an effort to see them away from the yard to be honest.
SO if you are not hugely into making friends, then just get some hobbies to keep you busy and to allow you to have fun doing things you enjoy. Volunteering for a charity would also be a good idea, that will be fun and you will feel you are doing something worthwhile with your time.
And you never know, one day you might actually meet a decent person through an activity, someone who you have something in common with and hopefully they will not be the sort to cause drama in your life. Not all friends cause drama, they are just the immature bitchy ones.
It is not unhealthy to be a loner, as long as you are happy with your life and enjoy what you do then I dont think its a bad thing. It is bad however to shut yourself off from society and never go out into the real world - many teenagers today are having this problem as they have grown up with computers and the internet so they rarely leave the house and interact with the world only online.
Do whatever makes you happy, and dont worry about having friends or not - just make sure you find the balance between being a loner and still getting out and about to do things you enjoy. These things dont have to be with other people, just as long as they are getting you out of the house that is all that matters.
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