A
female
age
22-25,
*3680042
writes:My boyfriends just got into the army gap year and has been 8 hours away for 4 days from where I live and he isn't aloud his phone except for about 30 mins on a Sunday and I already miss him so much. I was just wondering if anyone else has been in the same situation before and if there relationship ended up working out? Before he left he said when he comes back for Christmas this year that he will propose to me and all that which I would love because I love him so much and can't wait to start my life with him, I'm just worried because for 80 days we can barely even talk and then I won't see him very much up until Christmas he might fall out of love with me or something? It'd just be really helpful if someone who has been through something similar before would be able to provide me with some insight.
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (16 March 2017):
 It will be difficult as long distance is extremely hard. Off course you will miss each other and only time will tell if it works out with you guys, but proposing at Christmas is not a promise he should have made, you are still much to young to be married, and you both need to work out the future before making such huge commitments.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2017): Yes, the first 12 months of the relationship I've been in with my army partner, he was away for work . we've have been together 3 years and it can work but communication, trust, are key, and a firm understanding and acceptance of how it is being a army wife or gf is important.They will always be moved around or sent away for training for sometimes long periods.if you cant bare to be alone from your partner then maybe LDR are not for you. Long distance relationships can be a wonderful. When apart keep busy take up a hobby go out with friends.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2017): It will work if you want it to.
You can write letters!
You can avoid going out with other men and having sex with them!
You can wait the 80 days before you make any new plans.
You can do something useful with your life while he is on training.
He doesnt need to be tormented by will it work thoughts!
If you torment yourself by thinking he will have sex with an army woman you are doing yourself a disfavour.
Dont assume the worst before it happens and if you find yourself involved with someone else then send him the dear john letter telling him its over, but keep it short!
200 lines on why he's ditched wont cheer him up!
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice  +, writes (10 March 2017):
 13680042 asks "I was just wondering if anyone else has been in the same situation before and if there relationship ended up working out?"
Yes I did, and if you are going to make a life with an army bloke you will need to be able to do this. 80 days from now you will know if you are strong enough for this life. He on the other hand will be so busy that he won't have time to fall out with you.
You say you love him so much that you can't wait. but what he wants to know is if you love him enough to wait.
I won't lie most long distance relationships don't make it. I firmly believe that the don't make it because the love is just physical. An infatuation, not a soul love. More of an addiction than a relationship. Part of that is that men connect sex to love. they can't feel close without the sex. and that is what you should be fearing. That may be exactly the source of your fear.
Advice: While he is away work on yourself, your skills and your education. You need to be a strong independent woman to be an army wife. Don't give in to worry and jealousy. Make those 30 minute calls count. Plan to have things to say. Keep the bond deep. Talk about what IS not what you WISH. Celebrate hos victories and growth. Be happy for him.
FA
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