A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:First of all I am 23 and my girlfriend is 20I have been with my partner for about 5 months now. We got to know each other very well and started living together about 3 months ago. We get on really well and I am absolutely crazy about her. She has 2 kids to her ex boyfriend that I found hard to adjust to at first as I have never been with anyone who has kids before. The kids are 3 and 4 years old and I have got to know them both very well. I am seen as their dad by family, my girlfriend and the children but find it hard sometimes to adjust. Her ex boyfriend seems a complete wanker (sorry for my english) as he has never really given any money, support etc to the children. He cheated on the kids mother whilst she was pregnant with her 2nd child. Therefore my girlfriend ended it with him. she then had got pregnant with another guy and was caught pregnant. She then had an abortion with him, slept about abit (unprotected sex! now with the coil in though) and was also sleeping with the kids dad after splitting up with the guy that she had an abortion with.I find all this very hard to take in and dont know if im in the right relationship. I love her too much to leave her. What do you think that I should do?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2008): Is your girlfriend faithful to you now? If she's commmited to your relationship then she's probably turned a corner in her life. Being cheated on must have rocked her faith in men so if she loves you and she's committed then relax. But maybe both get an STI test to make sure "ghosts" from the past don't remerge. Don't worry about the kids, if they want you to be their Dad then it can be the most wonderful thing in your life if you grab the opportunity.
If you have your doubts over whether she's really changed her ways then you need to have a serious talk. Otherwise she'll get restless and you'll end up as the babysitter and paying the bills. You might feel sorry for the kids but you shouldn't be duped into rearing her children while she's still out and about partying.
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