A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Why do guys fall in love with girls?There was this guy that I had worked with about five years ago, and for the past three years we pretty much haven't talked at all. I was dating one of his friends at the time when we had worked together, so he and I had become friends at the time as well. Well just over a week ago, he randomly sent me a message just to check up on me and see how I was doing, and ever since then things have developed really quickly. We talk on the phone every night now, and before we realize it two hours have passed. We continuously keep finding out more and more things that we have in common. He said that he's been attracted to me ever since the first day we met, but he was respectful of what I had going on with my bf at the time. We still haven't seen each other again yet, but after talking on the phone so much, he says he's falling in love with me.Is it weird that within the course of a week he says he is falling in love with me, or is it different because we've known each other for a long time and he was always attracted to me? He is also the kind of guy that always has all of the girls going after him--for example, when we worked together, seriously almost all of the girls had liked him and/or tried to get with him. However, I was not one of the girls that tried to get with him, and now he is the one that is coming after me instead of me going after him like most girls. Ironic? Does that mean anything?He is a great guy and I do like him, but I am just trying to figure this whole situation out because it all seems to have happened so quickly. Is it possible to be falling in love just by talking on the phone now, and will it be the same in person when we finally see each other again or will it be different? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (19 September 2011):
 If he's been thinking of you all that time and wishing you were together then yes I think it is possible that he's in love with you already. Just remind him that you need to take it slowly at first and feel your way through for a while.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2011): So you liked him when you worked with him, he likes you, you talk on the phone for hours and enjoy it? Sounds like a good start on a relationship.Yes it is possible to fall in love over the phone. Will it be the same person when you see him, no, of course it won't. He will have changed in the last 3 years, as you have changed in the last 3 years. You will also see more sides of him than you would just over the phone. Your relationship with him will change in some ways, it is natural for that to happen as things develop. Things will either develop into a deep relationship where both of you are happy (hopefully), or it won't and things will end. You won't know what will happen until it has happened.You say he was popular with the girls when you knew him. Unless he seemed like a player it is nothing to be worried about. Why _was_ he popular? The answer to that question will tell you if it means anything, if there is an answer to it.Is it weird that within the course of a week he says he is falling in love with me? If you are talking on the phone for hours I would say it is not weird. Perhaps what he means by "falling in love" and what you mean by "falling in love" are different. In any case he has feelings for you, and is expressing that to you. How deep are they after a week, well probably as deep as feelings typically are after a week (hence the "falling in" part of "falling in love").Best of wishes to you.
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