A
female
age
41-50,
*ealingprocess
writes:Whoever can help me would be greatly appreciated. To start my story - my boyfriend and I have been together for 12 years, we have children together and I love him with all my heart. I just recently found out that he had an affair, it just crushed me, I feel like my life has been destroyed and I don't know who to talk to about this, I don't want to tell my friends or family because I don't want them to think I am stupid for staying with him, not only did he cheat, but he didn't use protection and the girl got pregnant with twins, she doesn't tell people they are his and he doesn't own up to them. I don't know if I really want to know if they're his or not. I don't know what I would tell my children. He also had a child with this girl before we met. I know that he is sorry for what he did and if he could take back all the hurt that he caused me he would, but he can't. A part of me hates him for doing this, but I can't imagine not spending the rest of my life with him. What I am trying to ask is do you think I can get over this and forgive him and put it in the past, because I just want my life back, I want to be happy again. Can someone please, please help me.Broken Hearted
View related questions:
affair, crush, want to be happy Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, healingprocess +, writes (19 April 2009):
healingprocess is verified as being by the original poster of the questionCloudysunshine & anomymous, I would like to thank the both of you so much, I really needed to get this off my chest and I didn't know who to talk to. Anomymous the girl that has the babies has a new boyfriend and she says he's the father. I told my boyfriend to get blood test done, but then I backed out, cause I don't know if I am ready for all that right now. I am trying to be so strong for my children I don't want them to see their once strong mother fall to pieces so I don't ask like anything is wrong with me, but when I am at work or alone all I do is cry, and I am so tired of crying, I just want to move on. My boyfriend doesn't talk about it cause he doesn't want to see me in any pain I truley know that he is so very sorry, but I just don't know how to move on, and I want too so bad and forget cause I don't think that it's fair it's destroying my life and I'm not the one who did the wrong it was her and him, and they both act like nothing happened.
A
female
reader, cloudysunshine  +, writes (19 April 2009):
you may get info on the internet about local counselling services. Talking should help you, and also you'd see things from different perspectives. Good luck!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2009): this betrayal will take time and aptly it is called a healing process.don't let him manipulate you though, you just be strong and firm and tell him that you are upset, hurt ans also angry. he has not confessed to fathering the twins. you know that he needs to support them if he is. how are you all going to manage. this man needs to now be realistic and account for the indescretions. he also needs to learn to be faithful to you.good luck and please stay strong. for your sake i hope there are no more skeletons falling from the cupbords.
...............................
A
female
reader, healingprocess +, writes (19 April 2009):
healingprocess is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi cloudysunshine,
Thanks for your quick response. I don't know either if I will ever trust him the same way, but I'm willing to do anything to see if We can make it work. I'm not to sure how I would go about the councelling though? Any ideas.
Thanks again.
...............................
A
female
reader, cloudysunshine +, writes (18 April 2009):
I don't think you'll ever trust him in the same way, but if you feel you want to work on it, have you thought about relationship counselling?
...............................
|
