A
male
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:I have been single for almost 2 years now and in college.Well there's a Russian woman that is my tutor at that I really like and want to ask out. I'm wondering if its ok to ask out my tutor. She is smart, super cute, and I like her Russian way. Is it ok to ask her out? How to do that? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (23 January 2022):
 So you are at minimum 18-19? Not 16-17?
Correct?
(not that age really matters in this answer).
She is your tutor. She is there to teach you. Not to be your love interest or flirt partner.
If you are BOTH college students, I'd say WAIT until you no longer need her help and she no longer is your tutor, THEN you can ask her out.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2022): In an effort to be mysterious or anonymous, most often OP's give a false age. Then confuse the matter by giving information that the age given makes the post appear to be fake or nonsense. You've been single 2 years and in college, but you're only around 16???
If you are a 16 year-old teenager, it is unlikely a "woman" will date an underaged kid.
If your parents are paying this "woman" to tutor you, it would be inappropriate to date you while she is being paid. Not to mention most parents would be furious to know an adult they've hired to tutor their son is dating him too!
Assuming you're an adult, I would think she might be offended by your advances; when she thought she was hired to tutor you, not to be cornered into dating you. It's unethical to hire people then ask them out on a date. They would feel their continued employment would be contingent on whether they agreed to go out with you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2022): No. No. No. Don't do it, you will look foolish and embarass her and make her feel awkward. She is your tutor and it would jeopardise her career.
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A
male
reader, kenny  +, writes (21 January 2022):
 I don't think that you should ask her out while you are sill her student. I would say that there are very strict policies on teacher student dating, if it was found out that she was seeing or dating student's she could get into a lot of trouble, or even told to leave the college putting her career in jeopardy.
I guessing she is quite a bit older that yourself. I know you think you really like her, but this is just a passing phase, just enjoy her being your tutor and secretly fancy her from afar but don't act on it and ask her out.
Maybe when you are a bit older, and finished your studies and left the college find out if she is single then. But don't be suprised if she has a boyfriend, or is even married.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2022): No and she would loose her position if she crossed that line. As it is a breach of being in a position of trust. All teachers care for their students correct but don't mis-read that into thinking it is from a romantic place, it is not. If it were then she should not be in a position of trust.
You're not the first and sure not the last teenage boy to have a crush on a older women. However as she is a college tutor it is a given she is far more established in her life, you are just starting out. What would you have in common?
For all you know she has a husband and kids at home, her personal life is not your business though.
Your tutors role is to educate you and help you gain the qualifications needed for the job you want nothing else.
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