A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am married and have been having marital problems for some time. My bf is a guy and we have been best friends for longer than I have known my husband. Recently, we shared with one another that we had feelings for each other. He told me that he had felt it for many years. He could even remember times when we were together and he wanted to tell me but was scared to. I have felt it for a few years. From the moment we told one another it was fantastic. Nothing like I have ever felt before. We both agree we are perfect for one another. Our connection is so intense. We have done nothing sexually because we both have morals. He has talked of a future together and starting off slow and making sure we do it right. I am in the midst of separation and he says we have to wait until time is right but has slowly started pulling away. We were talking everyday- now here and there. I believe an ex has come back in the picture and he may be talking with her. We are both older (late 30's) and he has dated many women but has never been married. I fear he is so ready for that, he might jump back into things with her for fear of being alone. I trust he has feelings for me but is it possible that he can just jump from all those old and new feelings for me-back to an ex just because he needs someone now and can't wait? Can his feelings change or go away just like that?
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female
reader, AskEve  +, writes (21 November 2008):
 Were you in the midst of your separation when he told you how he felt for you or did the seperation happen after he told you? If it was the latter then he might have taken cold feet and feels pressured that you're leaving your husband for him. If the feelings between you are so intense then it shouldn't matter about him talking to his ex again. Don't run after him, play it cool, continue with your separation and decide in your head what you want to do with your life. If things aren't working out in your marriage and you've made the decision to split then carry on regardless for YOURSELF and no one else.
If your friend does have true feelings for you then this ex shouldn't matter to him. Take a back seat, keep busy and let him come to you. Let him chase!
~Eve~
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