A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: True story: I knew "Ashley" for four years in high school, and then the day before we graduate I found out she's had a crush on me the whole time! If I had known about it sooner, I would have asked her out (she's pretty, smart, the whole package); but of course she didn't tell me until right before she was moving across the country!But this only the latest in a series of missed opportunities. The girls I think are interested in me, turn me down; meanwhile other girls want to date me while I'm oblivious. By the time I figure out that they want me, they've moved on or lost interest.Why are girls so hard to read?!
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the replies--you people rock.
A
female
reader, xLovex +, writes (23 August 2008):
hahaha I love this question
It is the same for girls too! The guys I like turn me down and the guys that I don't think like me do! Clearly people just need to be upfront about there feelings - including me!
I would rather be turned down and honest than to keep bottled up and regret never saying anything becuase you never know they might feel exactly the sameway- I'm not sure about other people but this question made me relise that :D But mysteriousness is very attractive but increases the risk of not getting some one!
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A
male
reader, pursuit of happiness +, writes (23 August 2008):
Why are you waiting 4 years to ask a cute girl out? Don't wait for them to tell you they fancy you, ask them out yourself first. Don't be two direct about asking them out, don't say "will you go on a date with me", say "hey do you want to get a drink(now)?" keep it casual initially. If a girl bothers to talk to you and continues to talk to you, there is a good chance she fancies you.
Be aware some people have aspergers syndrome which means they do not naturally read other people's subtle communication, they have to learn to do so and this can put them back socially by 10 years or more. However, you probably don't have this problem, but just in case your problems are wider socially than just dating.
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A
male
reader, ChiRaven +, writes (23 August 2008):
That, my friend, is a question that men have been asking themselves, and other men, since there have been men on this planet. And women.
Women don't like to be obvious about things. They want you to be "sensitive" to them, and "understand" their needs. It's a legendary game of miscommunication. Once in a while you'll find a woman who is willing to write it on the sidewalk for you, but mostly they seem to feel they don't have to, and it should be up to you to figure it out.
One thing you can do is to cultivate a really close woman friend or two. Someone you can talk to about life in general and women in particular. I got lucky in high school and started talking in freshman year to my best friend's girlfriend (she wanted me to spy on him for her, since he was a bit of a player). That was the start of a great friendship, and the two of us sat together at our 45th class reunion last year. Someone like that will not only help you understand women a lot better by interacting with you, but she will often be willing to drop hints about who might be interested in you. If there's a girl in your neighborhood that you've known since you were a kid, or something like that, she would be a good one to try to develop such a friendship with.
But on your own women can be strange and mysterious creatures. And frankly we men wouldn't want it any other way!
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