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age
36-40,
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writes: My boyfriend was out of country and we met recently after 6 months. I was really excited to meet him. When I saw him, his appearance put me off a bit. My boyfriend is not the best looking but still I love him for what he is and how he treats me. But when we meet a part of me feels he should dress a little more smartly and neatly. His own family also tells him to wear proper fitting clothes. Its not that I won't love him if he doesn't wear good clothes. Its just that I'm way too particular about the way my loved ones look and dress. Nonetheless we made love that day. I loved the closeness and warmth we shared. I love how he gets calm whenever we are together. After a gap of 6 months, this meeting was just enough to get us closer and fall more in love. But when he kissed me, there was no magic, no tingling sensation. Even while making love I couldn't orgasm properly. Even though I'm fine with it, my boyfriend felt sad he couldn't satisfy me. He feels I don't love him any more. I told him that this is not the case and pacified him. But still I want a third person perspective on this. Is there anything wrong with me or my feelings? Is it because I don't find my boyfriend hot?
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (17 December 2011):
 It sounds you have definitely cooled off toward him, or maybe the sparks weren't so many to begin with, if his fashion choices are enough to turn you off.
And note that I am rather into fashion and I like dressing nice and see well dressed people around me, but...if you are in love with a man, you are in love no matter what he wears . It's not that relevant ,because clothes always come off at a certain point :)
There 's a song in my country that says that distance from your partner works like a gust of wind on a fire: if it 's a big roaring fire, it makes it bigger and stronger,if it's a small , feeble fire it estinguishes the last embers.
Maybe that's what happened to you.
A
female
reader, Starlights  +, writes (17 December 2011):
 It sounds like from what you wrote some of your passion for your boyfriend has gone.
Judging him by the way he dresses is very superficial he could be the best guy for you! However it sounds to me like he does not appeal you much.
Therefore yes i would say you don't find your boyfriend hot anymore although the closeness/bond/attachment will be there.
Hope this helps!
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