A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:my boyfriend has a few fantasies and told me them. he asked me if i had any. thing is he is one of my first boyfriends so i don't really know any. what are some of them? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (22 April 2010):
 Be honest and tell him you aren't sure what your fantasies are when it comes to sex. Don't just make some up to sound cool or whatnot.
They will come as you mature.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2010): If you don't know what any are, then you have none. Tell him that. Fantasies are a personal thing that you think of yourself...something you really want. It's normal. Guys are generally more visual than girls, so a lot of girls don't have fantasies.
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A
male
reader, yankit +, writes (22 April 2010):
Explain that your fantasy is to have a faithfull trusting monogomous relationship with a man that respects our body. I'm afraid that will turn him off so be prepared for a break-up call. You can't control you fantasys any more than he can control his. It's that whole men are from mars-women are from venus concept. If I was a women I'd look for another woman.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (22 April 2010):
 If you dont have any fantasies just tell him you dont have any. Fantasies are the things you someday hope to do/things you only imagine but wouldn't really want to try out. Fantasies can be about anything, but I am guessing your boyfriend wanted sexual fantasies. It's perfectly fine if you don't have any, that just means you haven't explored your sexual side yet. Which at your age is quite normal.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (22 April 2010):
 You don't "know" fantasies. You would simply have them. What do you daydream about when it comes to sex.
Actually, this is a pretty typical male/female difference at your age. Guys spend a lot of time thinking about sex and imagining what they would do with a girl, specific girls or fantasy girls, real or celebrities or whatever.
Girls your age for the most part fantasize about how the prom date is going to go, and how romantic he'll be and that kind of thing. I doubt you are spending a lot of time having sexual fantasies, if you were anything like me at your age.
My daydreams were of having a date with the latest teen idol or what I would wear to the dance or being swept off my feet.
I would be honest with him and tell him that. There's no crime in not having fantasies, there's no crime in having them. This is a perfect time for you to practice good communication skills with your guy, and it will give you both a chance to recognize and honor the differences between you.
He is not going to believe you don't have any fantasies, I think most teenage guys assume the entire world is either thinking about sex or having sex all the time. So you may have some trouble convincing him.
He may as well begin to appreciate the difference in your psyche compared to his and you shouldn't be embarassed or ashamed or made to feel bad for not thinking the same way he does.
Just be honest. Be calm and loving about it, but be honest. What do you daydream about when it comes to your lovelife, romance and sex? That's the question you don't have to answer here, that's for you to think about and share, if you choose, with him.
Good luck.
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