A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am having a serious problem. My bf always swears at me, calling me all sorts of names, and I really hate that when he bought me something and do something wrong, when I confront him he wants his things back. I really love him but very confused. What do I call that cos I always talk to him about that but he don't listen. I want to dump him but I keep on wondering cos I love him and its not easy. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (6 November 2012):
You’re right it’s not easy, and it can be a really painful thing to dump some-one. But honestly, what exactly is there to love about this man? He treats you appallingly and has absolutely no respect for you whatsoever. Love isn’t enough, it really doesn’t conquer everything as hopeless romantics would have you believe. This boyfriend is spiteful and hurtful to you, and you can’t bury your head in the sand and think that because you love him all of that disrespectful behaviour somehow doesn’t matter. Take the plunge, realise it’s for the best and finish it! Get support from friends and family around you to help you come to terms with the break-up and cut him out of your life. Easier said than done? Absolutely, but sometimes the right thing isn’t always easy.
I wish you all the very best.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (6 November 2012):
 What do you love about him exactly? Do you love when he demands his gifts back? Do you love when he shouts at you? Do you love when he will not listen to you? Do you love the way he makes you feel when he swears at you? Do you love how he does not care that much about you or else he would stop treating you like this?
These are all questions you need to ask yourself. You need to remain strong and see for yourself that this is not the way a loved one is suppose to treat us, I mean yes all couples have arguments but if he is always treating you like this and has made no effort to change then this is what your future is going to be like unless you change it and find someone worthy of your love.
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A
female
reader, Zaaleena  +, writes (6 November 2012):
I think you've summarized how you're feeling yourself - you want to dump him because he verbally abuses you and when you challenge him on this he does not listen and continues to do it. He has no need to change the behavior because you accept it.
I'm really sorry if this is coming across strong but (to me) it sounds like you do not want to be in this relationship so should leave. Harder said than done but verbal abuse totally results in lowering your self esteem.
Good luck
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2012): it's called being an asshole. if there's one thing that's inappropriate, it's name calling and swearing at the people you claim to love. i don't care how mad you are at someone, you do not disrespect them and talk down to them like that. my gf and i have had our fair share of fights, but never, ever, EVER do we speak to each other like that. i'd dump him. it'll only get worse.
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