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female
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*ynnsie
writes: Why he did not pick up my phone when he was in a bar?I have been dating this guy for 7 month already, after Feb., we had a committed relationship. I turned down all of other guys and wanted to be with him with all my heart. He is a big party fan, I am ok with that, but I am not ok he put party at the top priority, everytime when I want to spend time together, he always has too many other things to run and keep our meeting as short as he can. He liked to party at least twice a week and usually very late until 4am or 7am. I complained that I did not want my boyfriend friday or saturday night to party with all single mates until 4am but leave me alone. I feel hurt and unimportant. This afternoon I called him to ask for dinner together, he was in the golf class, he said call me in the afternoon. But he called me back at 9:24pm, I felt so mad since I told him this feeling before. I was too upset to pick up his phone, but I miss him so much around 1:20am, I called him back, he did not pick up the phone,I know he is hanging out in the bar, I sent him msg asking "can u talk now?" he texted me back with "30min", I called him back after 30min, he did not pick up the phone, I was so angry, called him twice and wanna know why, he turned off his phone, I left his msg to break up.My life and happiness were totally destroied by this guy I love madly. I know once I called him twice, I sound controlling and not attractive at all, but I can not stand his obliviation any more. He called only when he had time such as parking, walking to school, otherwise, he can easily hang up my phone without I fininsh what I want to say if he ran into any friends or he need run for a dinner as such. Why I am stupid and be used/hurt for such a long time? I am so heart-broken, nobody treats me like this before, how can I get over him and get my happiness back?
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female
reader, Lynnsie +, writes (24 April 2006):
Lynnsie is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI gave him chance to explain why, he just rumbled about how busy he was in the afternoon when he was in the Golf class, but aviod the main point why he did not pick up my phone when he was in a bar, he said his phone was dead then. Gosh, he can texted me then and phoned me around 6:00am when he partied back- he said he was so tired and wanted to sleep, he said he would call me to talk once he woke up on saturday's afternoon.
He did not, again, I waited for his phone call all saturday, he just sent a short email saying he wants to meet up at the library on sunday, the reason is he need study for his homework. He did not bother to explain why again he did not keep him promise and wanted to talk, even now, he did not apologize at all for such things which hurt me so much.
I know it is not easy to run into someone you really have a feeling for, that is why i have been working hard and patiently on this relationship from beginning to the end. But he does not appreciate it and blow his chance to explain again and again.
I do not think he loves me at all, otherwise, he will not ignore my feelings again and again-
A
male
reader, palerider +, writes (24 April 2006):
That doesn't sound very good, but you should probably talk to him about your feelings face to face and give him a chance to tell you why he behaves like this. because he is with you for such a long time means something. do you want to throw that away so easily? do you think he loves you? has he told you so and do you believe him. if he does then he will not hurt your feelings so much anymore.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2006): Hi, I was in the same situation half year ago. He is a silly idiot, dump him, you deserve better!! Let him to learn what he should have known. You should not even give him time to listen that lame excuses like "the phone was dead" or "someone borrowed my phone".
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A
female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (22 April 2006):
 I dont think this guy actually realised he was behaving like such a shit. Or if he did he was doing it delibrerately so you would break up with him and he wouldn't have to break up with you instead.
Life is to short to mope on the whys and wherefores of an idiot like this. He mustn't have realised he was onto a good thing when he had you so all in all he now loses.
I promise you, you will eventually get over the pain and you will be able to move past it. One day you will find somebody who treats you properly and puts you before his partying.
Chin up.
xx
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