A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend have been dating for three years. I am 20 and he is 19. I noticed a year-a year and a half way through our relationship that he was lieing to me all the time.Just tonight i caught him in a lie that he didnt even have to lie about and when i got mad at him, instead of fixing the problem he just decided to get mad at me. Now i have told him if he keeps lieing to me that i am going to breakup with him. I really am i love with him though and the thought of us breaking up is the last thing i want to happen. Plus i have had a friend tell me resently that he cheated on me with her a year and a half ago but she didnt tell me this until she got mad at him. he told me it never happen and i want to belive him but i dont know what to think. so i have 2 questions 1 what should i do about the lieing, and 2 what should i think about what my friend said? please help me out!
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (28 January 2011):
A boyfriend who lies all the time shouldn't be a boyfriend. Your ultimatum is an empty one, I'm afraid, as he won't change and he knows you're willing to accept this kind of treatment. You've accepted lie after lie, and he knows he can get away with it because all you'll do is get a bit mad, then stay with him and let him continue to lie.
As for cheating, given that he is a total liar, I'm willing to bet that he did cheat.
So really, what's the point of being with someone like who has no respect for you at all.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2011): It's obviously a problem if he can't help himself and feels he needs to lie, even about the small things, and it doesn't augur well for any trust issues you might have with him. His lying doesn't have any real consequences as you say to him he has to stop lying and yet he continues to do so. Sit him down and talk to him seriously, if he doesn't listen, take a little break from each other, if he's serious about you then he will take the steps to correct his behaviour. If he has no compunction about lying then it will only lead to problems down the road. Good luck.
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