A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Im in bits. my boyfriend goes away next month to south africa for a placement and i cant even imagine being without him. we got together 6 months ago and he is leaving at the worst ever time ever...the run up to christmas. I feel like i keep pushing him away atm so i dont feel as torn up when he really does leave. I dont feel like seeing or talking to him. the thought of not being able to see him every day makes me sick. i know i shouldnt be doing this but i cant help it. i tend to push complications as such out of my mind and try not to think about them. how can i get over this feeling? :(
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female
reader, auntyR +, writes (16 October 2011):
my bf is in the forces and this means that he does have to go away for 6months on tours. It's really tough, but if you are a strong woman and a strong couple you can both get through 6 months. Keep in contact via email, skype, phone,etc. Make sure you both put the effort in to making it work. Don;t freak out about him leaving, because it will happen whether you like it or not. You just need to come to terms with it, sure it will be upsetting for you when he leaves, but make sure you keep yourself busy with other things. Plan ahead for days out and seeing your mates and family. Trust me you will be fine!
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (16 October 2011):
 I understand that this is a difficult time, off course you are going to miss him, it will be hard, but it is not forever and you can both still keep in contact am sure via the internet. Plus sometimes distance can make a relationship stronger.
It is very common to push people away when dealing with something like this, because you don't want to get any more hurt than you will be so you push him away thinking that it will make it easier. But it won't instead he will think you don't care about him and you will regret it as well once he does leave for South Africa.
I suggest you tell him exactly how you are feeling, and how scared you are. Reassure him that you care deeply about him and don't mean to push him away. Explain to him the situation so that he understands as well and doesn't feel like he has done something wrong. 6 months is a long time for you not to see him so instead of pushing him away now just try and spend as much time as possible with him that you can because if you don't you will regret it once he is away.
Use this 6 months just to concentrate on other things. Christmas is a family time, and yes off course you will miss him but you can still enjoy it without your boyfriend. Concentrate on spending time with family and friends and do hobbies that interest you. Keep yourself busy and it will fly in.
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