A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have a boyfriend and we’re been together nearly 3 years now. I have a trust issue; it’s just that I always found out that he’s chatting with some women behind my back. He watches porn/hentai. He even created new msn account. Last year I found out his new msn account and was wondering what was he doing in Japanese girls dating site... every time I found out he’ll gave me excuses and start blaming me for the past I had done. I done something regrettable and I hurt him but it was long ago... I changed! He always told me that he loves only me but he always keep bringing it up whenever I found out his wrong-doing. He can checked my laptop for whatever I’ve been doing but he doesn’t allow me to even touch his laptop... even when I go to his room, he’ll start being caution that I might try to spot-check or something.. I did check his laptop this afternoon and found out he was watching porn again but I ended up didn’t care anymore… I DO care but what can I do about it? I just kept quiet that I found out... if he knew I checked it, I’m doom once again! Any advice on what I can do to help him stop doing those? without him knowing my purpose of course.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2009): If your boyfriend doesn't want you to look at his laptop then there must be something he doesn't want you to see so talk to him about it. However, don't try to check up on him behind his back because if he catches you then your relationship could be over.
A
female
reader, gemmaxx09  +, writes (23 May 2009):
 what are getting from this relationship? you dont trust eachother, whats the point living ur lives checking up on eachother, there should be a respect of privacy and if you dont trust eachother you should be having a serious talk because if there is no trust then the relationship is not going to work.
I never dreamt of checking my boyfriends laptop or fone, i found out he watched porn coz i caught him and i laffed coz i kno tht he wud have never go behind my back with n e 1 else. However that is me, if you dnt lk him watching porn and actually going on these dating sites, instead of checking up on him tlk to him. It depends what he was saying to these women, if it was sexual or planning to meet up or something then yeh thts terrible. You need to analyse the situation will you ever be able to trust him?
There has to be honesty and communication between you, its best to talk to him about it and if he throws back in your face that you made that mistake and you hurt him you both need to tlk and work out how he can forget wat happened.
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