A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i think i am not normal help...while having sex with my boyfriend i always just want him to cum and finish fast i am always getting bored and i feel he takes forever to cum...and veryyyyyyyyyyyyy rarely do i cum..why is this Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2008): The only time I've had a girlfriend who wished on a regular basis for the sex to finish, it was because she had fallen out of love with me and was basically offering sympathy sex.
Unless he's as thick as a plank, he should know something is wrong in bed with the two of you.
If you are still in love with him, I'd recommend extensive exploration of your bodies - a whole heap of foreplay, but only after you're relaxed and comfortable - get him to cook you dinner and do the washing up, vacuuming etc.
Try after you've ovulated as well - your hormonal balance around that time should mean you're up for making love a bit more.
If you're no longer in love with him, break up now, there is no point in prolonging the agony.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2008): Have you been faking orgasms? Does your boyfriend realize that he isn't giving you the kind of pleasure you enjoy? Is it just a kind of tacit agreement between the two of you? He isn't a mind reader. If you continue to submit to boring-ass sex (not boring ass-sex) and never complain, he may interpret that as an endorsement of his sexual prowess. Most men have a default setting of thinking they're fan-freaking-tastic in bed until sensitively, gently, and lovingly corrected by their partners. Step up and tell him what you want during sex. Practice, discuss, and recalibrate until you find what works for the both of you.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (11 January 2008):
 Maybe, he need to polish up his sexual technics.He need to romance you , have more fore plays . Sex has become a boredom because it has become a chore .He is doing the same thing all the time and it becomes boring.
Change your varieties abit , Maybe you can make it in other parts of the house and not just in your bedroom.
Women can take a longer time than men . I suggest he make you come first by stroking , tenderly caressing your erogenous zones and lots of orals .
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (11 January 2008):
 Hi,
I hate to say it but you two just don't sound like you are sexually compatible. I have been with my partner for 12 years and all she has to do is touch me and I get turned on - its sexual chemistry.
If a great sex life is really important to you, then you might have to reevaluate your relationship. Alternatively, have you tried to spice things up in the bedroom , role play, toys , lingerie etc. These things can really help put the spark back.
Good luck.
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