A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:dear aunts and uncles.this is a tricky one because its not my problem but the difficulties between 2 of my friends who i love dearly and want to help!one of my best friends (il call her laura for the sake of this) is a closet bisexual. im one of the only people who knows about her sexuality. She told me about the feelings she has for one of our other friends (lets call her emma). She is completely head over heels for her. The problem is that emma is really confused about who she is and what she wants. her and laura have had some intimate moments together and im pretty convinced that emma likes laura just as much back. however, she cant make up her mind what she wants and its screwing with lauras head! emma says to laura that she doesnt want anything to do with her one day and then the next shes sending her all these texts and bringing it all up again. last week we all went out and laura was ignoring emma and trying her best not to show her feelings for her. anyway the next thing i know emma is coming up to laura and holding her hand and dragging her off into corners of the club to sit holding hands etc. then later she said to laura that she didnt mean anything by it.laura has said to me that she knows she needs to move on from emma and forget about her but she is completely in love with her and she cant move on knowing that emma does want her deep down. She is trying really hard to get over her but emma is making it so difficult.Theyve both been arguing a lot recently and i know that its because they both care about each other and are just scared. just seeing the looks they give each other and the way they are together when they get along, its just so obvious that there is mutual chemistry between them.I know this isnt my problem but i hate seeing laura heartbroken all the time and emma being so scared by her feelings that she is potentially throwing away something that could be really amazing. I want them both to be happy. i know they could make each other happy. how can i help them? laura has asked me not to mention anything to emma because emma doesnt want anyone to know whats happened between them. I cant sit back and watch them ruin each others lives anymore. do you think there is anything i can say or do to help either of them??any help and advice you could offer would be great thankyou xxxx
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (19 April 2010):
 No, you shouldn't interfere. But, if you absolutely feel that you must, have you tried talking to Emma and asked her innocently if she likes someone? Test her out by asking if there's any guy she likes? If she says no or is vague, then at least you know that maybe she does have feelings for Laura. But right now you don't know for sure, and it isn't your business either. I think what is best is for Laura to respect herself enough to stop hanging out with Emma. Of course she wont get over her if she lets Emma twin her around her little finger. But that is not your problem either and people have to figure these things out on their own.Perhaps you could ask Emma innocently why she fights with Laura so much, since you are all friends you want everyone to be happy and comfortable in each others company, and the fighting is bothering you.
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