A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend smokes weed. It doesn't bother me, but the other day he was gonna meet my parents for the first time, and he'd known this for a week beforehand, yet he still went over his friends and got high first. Is it just me being over sensitive? Seriously it's meant to be a big deal meeting your serious girlfriend's parents for the first time, right? And he went out and got high just before meeting them! I confronted him about it and he told me I need to chill and he's pretty sure they didn't notice anyway. But that's not the point, it's that he didn't care and wasn't responsible and got high before something really important. Do I have a right to be mad at him or should I just let it go?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2011): The problem you may have is that if that's his response to stress, life is going to suck for you. If he goes and gets high before every stressful event he'll be stoned forever.People that start using at a young age mess up their ability to emotionally mature and deal with stress as we need to be healthy adults. That makes life hell for their families.Look for a pattern- he could be really making some choices that will cause a lot of problems later in life.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (4 April 2011):
 Im with you, you have every right to expect more out of a guy. He showed you that he didn't think it was important. He might as well have gotten drunk before a job interview! If he doesn't understand the seriousness of meeting your family, especially for the first time, then he's lacking a bit of social conduct. It doesn't matter if your family noticed or not. What matters is that he didn't show it respect, and he didn't show you, or your family, respect. Besides, he was high. He wouldn't know if someone noticed or not. It's not that difficult to see if someone is high, they tend to have certain characteristics that give them away. For example dilated pupils. I think you should take his drug addiction more seriously. Imagine if it was alcohol and not weed. Would you have felt ok with him showing up drunk? Would you have just let it go? Im not dead set against weed. Once in a while, sure, for fun and party and relaxation, why not. But it has gone out of hand if he "needs" it to calm his nerves, or does it without considering the circumstances, like in this case. This sounds like more of an addiction than a casual thing, and you need to ask yourself if this is acceptable or not. He will likely do this again unless he shows some true dedication to changing for his own good. I would definitely not accept it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2011): I can understand why you would feel disrespected or that he didnt take meeting your parents seriously. But My bf smokes weed to relax and calm his nerves. Maybe your bf was nervous or anxious prior to meeting your parents and smoked to calm his nerves. As long as he didn't make a fool of himself. Forgive him..
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A
male
reader, chaz25 wales  +, writes (3 April 2011):
 i think if every thing when ok you should worry about it but on the other hand if you told him not to then he should have respect that but maybe he was a bit nerves and it help him the main thing is that your happy and you love each other i hope this help x
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