A
female
age
30-35,
*upthatsme
writes:I need help and opinions. Keep in mind I know how reckless I have been with my own heart and I don't need you to tell me that...I am 19 years old. I met a man at work I was completely infatuated with and I gave him my number.He ended up calling me the next day and from there we started getting to know each other. Anyways, he was really weird from the start. He never text back, never returned my phone calls and only called on his time.I just figured he was always busy which he said he was... Anyways. He would tell me how much he liked me and how he saw a future with me and the sweetest things in the world and I thought to myself "wow he really must be into me." Keep in mind he told me he was 29 with no kids. Anyways I ended up having sex with him and I thought it was such an amazing night.He called twice after that and I haven't heard from him in two weeks. I was beginning to look at all the signs and it led me to believe he was married. Turns out he is not married but I got my true answers. He is really a 35 year old and he does have a 17 year old daughter. He lied about his age and his child...I don't understand why? Do you think he felt high and mighty that he could still pull young girls or what? I want to know if I should tell him that I know and give him a chance to explain, to give me some answers. The silence on his end is hurting me. I know for a fact that he lied about these things because I spent the money for a people search and my boss also confirmed it with me. Please somebody give some advice. I still care for him as stupid as that may sound to you...I just want to know if I should tell him...
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (7 February 2013):
 Unfortunately, you've opened yourself up for a "parent"-like reply to your submittal.....
HERE are the telling sentences: "I just figured he was always busy which he said he was..." and, "...Keep in mind he told me he was 29 with no kids..."
So.... you've got TWO flagrant and substantial lies.... and behaviour which is classic "guy gets girl to put out, then commences to acting like a cad..." so, I think you know all you need to know to cut this guy out of your life, and don't look back.....
Good luck....
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (7 February 2013):
 he lied because he was smart enough to know that a wise 19 year old girl would not want to get involved with a 35 year old man with a child two years younger than him..
does NOT matter WHY he lied honey... the fact is HE LIED
he can never be trusted.
you still care for him.... so you say... why?
he lied about his age (never a good thing)
he lied about being a parent.. I"m so proud of my kids I tell everyone about them.
my husband is closer in age to my oldest child (he's 11 years older than him) than he is to me.... I have no issue with age gaps.
my issue is that he LIED
he's STILL LYING
and you think that confronting him or asking for an explanation will resolve this... it won't.. it will just bring MORE LIES and more distrust.
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A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (7 February 2013):
 I would send him a message that you are nothing but a liar and a person who uses woman. You also have a young daughter imagine how you would feel if someone treated your daughter the way you treated me. I am also someone's daughter.
After that block his number and dont ever contact him. He is not worth it and you deserve better.
No matter what your heart says dont take him back because he will just use you for sex, especially now that you know him, he will think you okay with what he did to you.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (7 February 2013):
Well, he might have really liked you and been afraid that the truth would turn you off. Sort of the same way if someone asks how tall a shorter guy is he always adds an inch.
So his intentions might not have been to deceive you as much as it seems. Still, he did lie, and even if he thought it was a victimless lie, it's never a good thing to be dating a liar.
You should say something to him if you decide to date him, but to be honest with you it doesn't sound like you're dating anymore.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2013): You should distance yourself totally from this man.He is a liar obviously. You are a young girl with your whole life ahead of you and deserve an honest decent man. If he contacts you, have your response ready, and stick to it. Tell him you are aware of his lies and want nothing more to do with him. Get out there any enjoy your youth, freedom, and waste no more time on people who are dishonest. You have feelings for him because you are a good person, it might hurt now, but in time you will realise you had a lucky escape. x
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