A
female
age
51-59,
*hygirl0490
writes:I'm a 41 year old female that is in love with this married women she has children. she said that her husband is good to her and the children. she tells me that she loves him but she is i love with me. My feels for her is very strong i love her more than life its self i just can't see myself without her. she tells me that if she leave him it would hurt the kids. I didn't no want to do can you give me some advice.I feel so lonely with out her around me. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (14 October 2012):
 Unless she leaves her husband and makes a life with you, there isn't much you can do.
I think it's very unfair and very cruel to tell someone you love them if you have little chance of being with them, especially if you know that person is in love with you, lonely and pining.
When you cannot change a situation the best thing to do is to put space between it and you. Hanging around her when nothing can be done (because she is married and had kids)will intensify your pain and suffering.
Not all loves can work out...you need to move on.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2012): The writings on the wall. She already told you she is not leaving so you have two options. You can continue to see her and continue to feel like you feel or leave her alone and find someone single that can give you what you need. The choice is yours. I know you have strong feelings for her but you are settling for being second and not first. You have to seriously ask yourself is this worth it. I know you are in pain, but look at it this way. You can leave now and the pain last for a little while. Continue to stay and have constant pain. Not being able to see her, call her, or visit when you want. Your decision. Best if luck to you.
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