A
female
age
41-50,
*lwoodbluelou
writes:Okay so, in general, I'm a mostly happy person.I'm involved with theatre in school, I have good grades, a few guys like me, I'm a little confident in myself, I'm in band, I'm in deca, and so on.So pretty much I'm a happy person... but I always feel like behind it all, I'm sad. I'm never 100% completely happy.. there's always that nagging feeling that I screwed something up or something along those lines, but when I try to figure out what it could be, I draw a blank.How can I make it go away?thanks in advance.. Reply to this Question
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reader, elwoodbluelou +, writes (10 January 2009):
elwoodbluelou is verified as being by the original poster of the question sorry, again, im 14. i cant figure out how to change my age :(
sorry for the confusion.
and thank you for your help everyone =)
i really appreciate it.
alot.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2009): Is that your true age? You mention school, band, guys, etc. I just 'feel' you are younger. Being an adolescent going through small smatterings of 'self-doubt' like this, is par for a lot of teens. The teen social structure is harsh and friendships are lost, easily, just on things as trivial as fashion trends and poor hair! lol But if you are older, as you say you are..a lot of adult people go through. It's likely... 99% probable, that most people like yourself, have never, ever 'screwed up' or done/said anything, bad. The problem is they think they have and it keeps them wondering what others may be thinking of them. Some people let this really get to them. And it does create anxiety in them, especially if they don't understand why. This is just my opinion and I may be off here, but I feel, that perhaps somewhere, a person like yourself, may have been treated badly and acquired an emotional scar of sorts. Being criticized harshly/verbally abused, degraded, teased incessantly, causing one to feel under-appreciated or not valued enough, by others, especially friends and social contacts. What then happens, is one becomes extremely sensitive to other people's opinion's of them. This is a state of being self-concious and it does cause a lowered self-confidence. What can be done. Start believing in yourself, not worrying about this so much. It's tough and one has to be very self-aware, of when they are thinking in this negative way. As humans, we do make mistakes, we do err sometimes. A lot of people do it and forget it. But we can't be so darned hard on ourselves, when we do that. We forgive ourselves, we rectify the situation and we move on. So if you can't even think what has happened to make you feel like you screwed up, you need to know..no one is perfect..we all have moments of inadequacy, and failure. Some of us just deal with it better..some of us allow it to hinder their happiness. You sound like an amazingly accomplished young woman...so you need to know, you probably have a lot of friends that accept and love you just for who you are. But sadly, the only way you can rid of this 'self-concious' little quirk, is by trying to understand and maybe forgive the people, who put that 'burr in your shorts' in the first place. I am not saying go and blame someone else. I am just saying try to understand what happened that could've caused this in you. It might take some time, but this is life, We grow , we develop ourselves and we learn from life. It's an ongoing evolvement. isn't it. Good luck, hun, relax and don't let the little things get to you.
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A
male
reader, deuce +, writes (10 January 2009):
In my advice which i have gone through this... it doesnt matter how involved you are because that it just keeping your mind off the true problem until you are at home in ur room trying to go to bed and u realize that your just not happy... wat got me out of that funk was i got a gf and i know its easier then said but it honestly made me happier because i had someone to go to when i wasnt feeling 100%
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A
female
reader, nickie123 +, writes (9 January 2009):
 well talk to someone tell them everything that's going on in your life well not everything but the things you might not like or adore
i think that most woman go through that not confident life am i pretty enough blah blah but do you love yourself i think when you love yourself that sadness will go away hoped i helped :)
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