A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my boyfriend for almost five months now, and he still hasnt told me that he loves me. when we are together our relationship seems great but when apart he seems a bit distant and as if he doesnt appreciate me. Im not sure if he really does love me but once when he was drunk he told me that "i really care about you" and he says im lovely, beautiful etc. I want to know how he feels about me and how much he cares. maybe he is just shy with his true emotions. And are people really honest when drunk? Any advice would be great.thanks
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice. I think i should either ask him or just leave things as they are. You're right, i should'nt rush things.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2009): Well you shoud first take time to be glad that he didn't tell you he loves you before he means it. I did that once.. told my bf i love him too but i didn't yet.. i just felt cornered. The next guy, i waited till i was ready.. and do you know how long i kept him waiting? 7 months. But lord knows when i finally said it, I meant it. And now we're married.. and I love saying it all the time.
Maybe he is just shy.. but maybe he doen't love you yet. That's a pretty big thing and i think he's being wise to e said he cares for you though, and i believe that because if he didn't, he wouldn't be with you all these months now would he?
Why don't you just try asking him. Have you told him you love him? Because you know, it's not as society tells us where we have to wait for the man to say it. The person who feels it first, says it first. Doesn't that make so much more sense? Just ask him how he feels about you? How much he cares and how well he thinks the relatinship is going. You can't rush love though. Goodluck.
~Sy.
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A
male
reader, Rogerramjet  +, writes (22 July 2009):
For some people, the "L" word is really very hard to say... Has he been burned before in a relationship?
I found that after my first TRUE full-on relationship (of 2 years)... After it broke up, i had alot of difficulty allowing myself to get too attached to another woman.. Basically a self-defense mechanism to prevent me from ever being THAT hurt, again...
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