A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:This is the follow up to the Co-Worker question. I've kissed my co-worker the past 3 times we've worked together. My boyfriend found out about the first time and almost left. I wish he would have. I don't want to hurt him, but I really want to be with my co-worker. He's super sweet, kisses my forhead and nose, smiles at me, has amazing blue eyes, and is super cute. Though his material things are nice, I love his personality. He makes me feel relaxed. The boyfriend makes me tense. He upsets me a lot. There's a rare day that there isn't some form of argument. It's hard to be with him, but it's hard to leave him. Advice is DEFINITELY needed.
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male
reader, PeteTTT  +, writes (4 April 2009):
Only one answer to this: Be honest with yourself and leave your boyfriend, it might hurt him in the short run but no break up is painless and by doing so, you're allowing him to find someone else. Dare I say it, he might find someone better who doesn't go around kissing co-workers behind his back. Kissing people behind your partner's back is pretty low, if you're not happy in your relationship you should deal with that first and foremost, for someone who claims to not want to hurt her partner, kissing people behind his back is strange way to go about it. Remember that whilst your co-worker might seem like the best thing since sliced bread right now, arguments might develop later on, very few relationships are bad from the start and the fact that you kissed him behind your current partner's back could lead to him getting insecure if any cracks appear in your relationship, after all, who you going to be kissing next time you get bored or feel that things aren't working quite right?Good luck, try to be more honest with yourself and the next partner you get.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (4 April 2009):
There is no magic answer here that will solve your problems.
You just have to actually grow up, stop waiting for your problems to solve themselves and take control.
You do know that by messing around hoping your boyfriend will leave you and you won't have to do the dirty work, it tells the co-worker that it's never going to happen?
Tell your boyfriend that you don't think it's working, that you aren't happy and think that both of you would be better off if you split up.
Be gentle but firm. Say you are sorry but your feelings have changed.
Get on with it before your co-worker figures out that he's been used as a bit on the side and moves on.
Good Luck!! xx
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