A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm a first time single mom. my baby is 12 weeks old. my closest friends don't have children, so it's a little more interesting now because our lives have suddenly become so different. they have the freedom to well, just be free. in no way am i envious because i love spending all my time with my baby. my baby is so amazing. a week ago, a friend encountered some troubling times in her home life and essentially she has no place to live at the time. she got very reckless and sort of went on a bender. she spent most of her weekend partying and trying to get me to go out with her. of course i said no. she met up with an old friend of hers and that's who she's staying with. so last weekend, she attempted to set me up with this friend of hers, but i didn't want to hang out with them. this guy started contacting me saying how he wanted to hang out but understood we couldn't and that he hoped we could soon. i find this guy attractive but i have some concerns. As a new mother, i know it's important that i be more mindful of who i allow into my life. i think this guy . is fine, but i want to.get to know him more. As far as dating, i feel sort of guilty. i feel like all my attention should be on my baby. i guess i don't quite get how to balance dating and parenting. any tips?i have this weird thing where i feel like I'm not interesting enough anymore now that i have the baby. all i do is hang out with the baby. it's not exactly exciting stuff. i feel like I'm kind of boring and its discouraging.lastly, the guy has shown a desire to get to know each other. he gave me his number. does it matter when i contact him, if i choose to do so? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2014): Where is the child's father? You should be making every effort to have him become an active, involved part of his child's life.If he chooses not to be in his child's life, then you should be fulfilling your responsibility as a mother to ensure he fulfills his responsibility as a father to financially support his child to the fullest extent of his ability to pay.Given that baby daddy is apparently completely out of the picture within a few months of impregnating you, at the moment you're dealing with enough fallout from your love life. Introducing a random stranger into your newborn's life is probably not in yours or the kid's best interests, especially when said stranger is in the habit of taking in stray drunken women. Very few men would be actively pursuing a new mother; who knows what his motives are?
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (5 December 2014):
 First of all, your baby is 3 months old, dating should NOT be on the forefront of your priorities. There WILL be time for that. Focus on YOU and YOUR baby.
HOWEVER, you can still socialize, just easy back into a social life slowly. Do you have friends/family who are willing to help out with babysitting, so you CAN go out (and I'm not saying to party, but to hang OUT with friends).
With that said, I don't know if you are working or not. If you are NOT, then baby should be first priority, finding a job should be your secondary and socializing and dating... further down the list.
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