A
male
age
41-50,
*ryptonite
writes: I just had a talk with ex girlfriend and to sum up what happened I told her I got help from a therapist about my behavior and actions and then she said "I'm glad you are getting help but its all about you. You detroyed life, I feel miserable when I'm around you, u don't even care about me or my feelings and I don't want nothing to do with you, we can't ever be friends. I know u have a alcohol problem and if nobody cares to go with you to get help ill go and support you that's it". I do love my ex a lot and care but my actions say different at times. I don't know what to say or do. I trryed and seems she's not ready to talk or let me be her. Please help any suggestions would be greatly apperciated.Thank you
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male
reader, The Realist +, writes (2 February 2011):
I am assuming that the problem are true and it's great to hear that you are getting help. She needs to see that you have changed. If she is willing to go with you to get help then bring her along and listen to what she wants to see changed. This will show her that you are commited to change and in time when you truely do change she should realize that you are the person she loved and you will treat her right. I'm not saying it's a for sure thing but it is the best choice you have since your word isn't worth much. If it was actions that caused the problems then good actions can fix them.
Even if it doesn't work you should know that you are becoming a better person that will stay with you through life and you will find someone who loves you for that.
A
female
reader, 23ftigereyes +, writes (1 February 2011):
i have the same problem. i treated my ex like shit: dumped him twice, lied to him, etc.. men have usually treated me like this, and it's like i took it out on him - the one guy who loved me and treated me well. i don't know how it happened, all i want is to get him back. same with my ex. he is only talking to me after i dumped him a week ago bc my grandma is in the hospital. i am trying to get him back, but he says after grandma is fixed, he wants nothing to with me.i think the fact that your girlfriend is willing to go to support u is a good sign. this shows she still has feelings for u, so it's NOT a lost cause trying to get her back. i just really don't have advise on how to get her back, because i'm in that situation and i don't know myself. i think the fact that there is dialogue and they're talking to us is a good sign.
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