A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I came out of an 11 year relationship a little over a year ago and since then I have found it really difficult to form a meaningful relationship with another man.I don't seem to have difficulty attracting a man in the first place and over this past year I have been fortunate enough to experience a mutual attraction with a few, but, I don't seem to be able to successfully move the relationship forward.In the last year each man I have met seems to have an excuse for not wanting anything to develop. I had a two-month relationship with a man I have liked (and he has liked me) for 18 years only to be told bad timing! Had a fling with a guy who lives long distance - too far for a relationship, another one turned out to be married and the fourth decided to go back to his ex.I am beginning to think perhaps this says something about me as I can't just be unlucky in love can I? I didn't expect it to be this hard!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, wonderingcat +, writes (3 March 2009):
 Don't look and you shall find it! (who said that? LOL)
11 years of a committed relationship is not an easy one to forget nor to get over, so I think it is only natural that you are being cautious.
Being in a relationship is nice, everyone wants to have a loving companionship for each other. But that does not mean that being on your own is a lonely place to be, does it?
For the time being, I think it is just as nice for you to have mutual attraction (but not FWB) with men [unmarried] friends.
There are a lot of attractive independent women are in a happy place without a partner out there. Just take it easy, and you will find one as soon as you are in a happy place and at peace with yourself. Just think, despite the fact that you are no longer with your ex, at least you were "lucky" for a few years, some people did not even have that.
Hope you find your inner peace and be friends with it. Nothing is more attractive and appealing than a woman who has that.
Cat
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