A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello, I'm 24 (almost 25), married, a recent college graduate, and in 9 months... A dad. I just found out today from my wife (who is almost 21 and who is starting her senior year of college in the fall) that she is pregnant. We are not ready for this. I'm kind of excited but I'm scared out of my mind! I've been thinking about attending grad school lately for a dual MBA degree but I don't think I can do this now because I have to support a family. My wife and I got married two years ago and we live with my parents in a seperate area of the house, so we do not have any bills except for our student loans, which aren't too bad. I have $20,000 and my wife will have $15,000 in student loan debt when she graduates. I'm also working part time right now as a computer support technician and my wage is $18 an hour. I just don't feel financially ready for a baby yet but I don't want to tell my wife to have an abortion, either. What would you do if you were in my situation?
View related questions:
abortion, debt, live with my parents Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (10 July 2012):
 So many dearly loved children in this world started just like your Baby-on-the way.
Yes it is tough faced with bills and aims and ambitions.
But some re-evaluation of the budget can uncover all manner of savings.
And the strategic skills you already have will be supremely enhanced by parenthood as you manage a new workload
Your empathy rating will skyrocket after you have started being a parent to a bundle of joy.
Then there are great opportunities to net work amongst a whole new world of new parents.
You will also probably find that your EQ will also be enhanced by parenthood. One needs good Emotional Intelligence to negotiate all the things involved in being a parent.
In a word, you will kind so much upskilling will take place in a short period of time you will be wishing for baby number two before long.
You are very lucky that you have awesome Family support.
You will also rediscover so many wonderful experiences - some revisited from your own childhood and some entirely new and delightful.
This will work out and at the end of the day you will be so happy that you have had the opportunity to become a parent at this time in your life.
Talk things through with your partner
Check the budget for where you can economise
Start discovering the delights of pre-loved items. After all even Even Antiques in the future were once pre-loved items?
Make a commitment to home cooking over take-a-way
Make a commitment to exploring more local places where you use foot power to do the exploring rather than air travel
Pre-loved clothing will never bother a baby. They just want your love. And the will return the favor with their cheeky toothless grins.
When you do want to entertain friends ask everyone to bring a plate.
Just as Millions before you have made this work so will you. With a Great Big dose of Understanding and communication between the two of you
Best of luck with this amazing great adventure.
And people go on to do further studies in their 30s even beyond.
Life is just starting to get really interesting for you. And I hope you enjoy it to the max.
A
female
reader, mpumie  +, writes (7 July 2012):
 The good thing is that you are married. These things they do happen when you least expect them. At least you are still staying with your parents so there might be help from them. Don't worry. There will be a way out of this but not an abortion. Talk to your parents and see what they will come up with. Its going to be hard but its not a train smash. A child is a blessing so enjoy it!
...............................
|
