A
female
age
22-25,
*aren567
writes:So i am in love with my first cousin. Me and him have been together for 3 months. His mom and my mom are sisters and no one knows that we love each other. Yesterday his mom read messages that we wrote and she basically knows that we have a thing. I really dont know what to do. Do you think she will tell my parents? Im just really scared and ive cried a lot. Please i need help. I really love him
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female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (28 July 2017):
 Hi darling.
It's a tough situation you're in but someone I know was in a similar situation to you, although she's older BUT I will give you the same advice that I gave her.
Yes, your aunt will probably inform your parents but no you should not be scared. Why? because you should be able to face what you've gotten yourself into. Looking at your age, I can see why it's so overwhelming, you're very young, and afraid.
Family is family. I've had a few people date someone only to later find out that their bf/gf is like a second cousin (the family was estranged) and they broke it off immediately which I would advise you to do because you're young and don't know what romantic love is. At your age you should only know about agape love. He is your cousin dear, and family is off limits. It's just a crush, trust me. It's something that you can get over and we're not saying this to hurt you but more so to stop you from diving head first into a big mess.
There are so many nice young boys that you can experiment the dating world with. So many boys that are of no relation to you.
You need to sit down with your parents when they find out and talk to them. In fact you should tell them first, and get them to help you through it. Just like us, your parents will only say what they will say because they're trying to save you from all the trouble that you will face if you continue to go out with your cousin.
All of this might not be what you want to hear now but later on, you will thank us for it.
A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts  +, writes (27 July 2017):
 She should tell them; you can't be left alone with him if you won't respect the boundaries that you're supposed to have with family members.This is a crush, not romantic love. It's normal to have a crush on a cousin (or similar), but it's not good to encourage it or acting on it.You need to be mature about this, OP, and stop this "relationship". It's not healthy to become a couple with a relative, nor should you allow your conversations to be flirty or inappropriate.Please stop, OP. You'll regret it in a couple of years, if you don't. Either way, do not become intimate!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2017): That's incest. Please don't do that, it's weird. Also, you're like 13. You have lots of timr to find the right person. There is nothing you can do. You have to confront her and talk it through. You're her daughter, she's not going to just disown you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2017): Oh sweetie, such things can happen; but you know they shouldn't.
You're just a couple of kids. Maybe she won't tell because this is normal when you're first learning about your feelings at your age. Being first-cousins, it is hopeful that you have not introduced sex into this. If you have, his mother should tell yours. You're both getting too close, and you're a bit too young to be expected to respect the boundaries without proper supervision. You'll follow your feelings and disobey their rules.
I think she should tell your mother; because your feelings are going to get the better of you, and you will try and continue behind their backs.
You have to learn that even though you think you have romantic-feelings for him; they should be different toward people who are related to you by blood. If you got pregnant, you'd be terribly afraid to tell anyone, and both sides of the family would be very upset with the both of you. What would you do with a child when you're just a kid yourself?
Both your sets of parents need to know; because they can help you two to keep things under control. They may be upset at first; but they know kids going through puberty are feeling their hormones for the first time. It's better to just explain things and behave as adults and parents should.
Just understand that if they overreact, it's just how parents are sometimes when they're shocked or concerned. They don't want things to get out of hand. It may catch them a little by surprise at first.
You both kept it a secret; because you already knew they would be angry. So that's why they are justified to be upset, and also why they all should know.
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