A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Had my heart broken bad 15 yrs ago. pretty much gave up on ever dateing again. Joined a gym 3 yrs ago. There was a guy there that immediately took interest but he was in a relationship. I moved away from that area and lost touch with my skiduel at the gym. Went there on a odd time a few weeks ago and there he was. He waisted no time letting me know that he split up with his girlfriend 5 months ago and asked where I went. after a brief few words I got of the tridmill and quickly looked at him and left. I think that cupid must have been standing right there. I can't seem to think about anything else. Went back the same time the following week with a friend and there he was. He was with his brother so I gave him my number to pass to him since I am afraid to death of him for some reason. I left and went next door to the Macs Store and it looked like he followed. I panicked and ran! Totally avoided him and he left. I went back the next week again and he was there. I couldn't bring myself to even speak to him and ended up making a fool out of myself by demanding my friend to leave right away. I will be going back this week. I really like him and after watching me all this time I think that maybe he likes me too. Although I may have messed everything up. Need advise bad! Way too scared to approac him. What can I do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2013): Wow, aren't you popular! Guys are fighting over you, hitting on you non stop, then why are you so shy? It should give you much confidence just to be hit on non stop by guys.I find it also very strange that you were trying to 'avoid a scene'. What scene? Is this guy that you are attracted to nuts? What is he doing walking around GYM having arguments with guys who talk to you, or who you are with? Are you sure you guys are in your 40s. It sounds like a bad teenage sitcom, really. You are asking if it's a normal behavior for a man to run after you? I don't see why not. You gave him your phone number, he wanted to talk to you, why can't he run after you?If you want to start seeing this guy, you need to do a step toward him, how else he is supposed to approach you. In a any case I find this whole thing is very weird, with you being scared like you are a little 16 years old, and him starting arguments with other guys like he is actually entitled to it. You are not even dating! Even if you were, other guys don't know that, if they hit on you, you should handle the situation, not him. It's very easy to let these guys know that you are not interested.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2013): I'm not weird! The reason why I left in a hurry was because I needed to avoid a confrontation. The guy from the gym had gotten into 3 arguements with other guys who were hitting on me. I was there with a male friend with whom i've known for a long time. However this guy wouldn't know this. I'm not sure if he was watching to see if I walked in alone or with somebody. I tried to avoid causing a scene. I didn't even recognise the guy from the gym when I saw him again at first. He had lost 80 lbs and had no girlfriend with him. I was just attracted to him again and he just kept staring at me and paceing the floor. I stopped and asked him if I knew him from somewhere. His reply was yes, I'm your hero! (Your knight in shining Armor!)Since I moved away and have to commute to the gym with a friend now, I needed to get my Phone number to him since I had no idea if I would get back there again any time soon or even at all. I am a very shy person espically around men and I got scared. I didn't expect him to run after me either. Is this normal behavior for a man? I will be going back again this weekend. Not sure if he will show up though. I guess he feels let down. I know that I certainly am. If by some miracle, He does show up I will try a different approch.
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A
male
reader, CMMP  +, writes (3 January 2013):
I hate to say this but he may have been attracted to you at the beginning, but you may have ruined it. If I was him I would think you were weird. Actually I think you're a little weird anyways, no offense.
If you couldn't bear talking to him before your great escape what makes you think it'll be better now?
You need to face your fears and deal with this head on. Walk in, tell him that you're embarrassed by how you acted the other day but you're a little intimidated by him (he'll find that cute most likely).
Then ask him on a mini date, coffee or whatever. Have enough of a conversation with him that you don't need to feel awkward when you see him, but don't have a full fledged date with him until you're a little more comfortable otherwise you risk permanently messing things up.
Good luck!
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