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Attracted to a girl in my class but I think she's straight...

Tagged as: Gay relationships, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 January 2009) 2 Answers - (Newest, 18 January 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Ok, I really, really need help .I am a senior in high school; and I think I have a "Different" kind of crush. You see, I sit behind a girl in class, who I consider to be talkative and extremely annoying...But I think I have fallen for her. Recently over my break I randomly thought of who I missed, and I discovered I missed her the most; even more than my friends. Seriously.

I get a vibe that she's straight for the most part; she seems to talk about guys, saying that some are hot and such. Though earlier in the year she gestured a wink and said "My god, you’re so pretty ___." In her usual weird manner. That really has had me thinking since. She usually doesn't talk to me, unless her friend, who sits next to me, does, and she always seems cheery to talk. She also seems to like picking on me and my interests, but so far, it seems that comes natural for her to do.

Whenever we talk, the next day is like it never had happened. Recently, in class, we've rotated, and she's right next to me, so I tend to scoot away to avoid her seeing a possible blush from me...And from the tip of my eye, I have seen that she looks at me for periods of times and shifts her gaze away whenever I fidget or move.

Also, as a past experience, the day everyone was “Dolled” up, she again, said I was looking pretty, but hugged me briefly. Being shocked and in denial, I didn’t hug back and said “I think you’re mistaken,” and gave a slight frown…I tend to slightly frown whenever I get compliments and gestures like so from her, because I don’t want to show the even most slightest bit that I really like her.

I dearly hope she doesn’t get the impression that I hate her…Oh, and one more thing, I have a boyfriend (I’m Bisexual), who constantly makes me think of dumping him for his inconsiderate actions. Thing is she knows I’m taken, and only said “Since when? I had no idea you two were together…”

I don't consider myself "Pretty," I’ve been cruelly labeled an emo/goth, and I haven't really acted like my true self around her; I act stiff/nervous/emotionless: So I have my doubts that she is attracted to me. But my questions are:

Is it possible that she is?

Is there a way I can fish for an answer to see if she's Bisexual or Lesbian without being suspicious?

How can I neutrally hint her that I fancy her, without me directly signaling "Hey, I have a crush on you!" ???

View related questions: crush, lesbian, period

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2009):

You should confront her privately about this situation.

Whatever you do, or however you want to approach this situation, I have one tip for you...

Never Write It Out On A Letter. Or E-Mail Her.

Please Do Not take this tip lightly.

Always find a way to confront her face to face,

And verbally tell her how you feel, and ask if she feels the same way.

Confronting your sexually is hard in high school,

but by senior year mostly everyone is pretty accepting.

I hope things work out for the best with her.

Good luck, and congratulations ahead of time on graduating.

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A female reader, Ask JenniHearts  +, writes (16 January 2009):

Ask JenniHearts agony auntits always hard to fing=d out if some one you like is straight or gay. i'm a bisexual living in south texas... i can hear the kkk running up as i type. you have to watch her movement twords girls and see how she approaches them. as around and just drop hints. its hard i know but we have to master it

you can alsways just straight up ask her if she is and if she denys it just say oh some one was whispering it dawn the halls.

hope this helps

jenni hearts

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