A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I want opinions, if you went away on a trip and your bf talked to you everyday during the trip and before the trip you either saw your bf or talked to him everyday. Then a couple of days before your trip ended he stopped calling texted very little. When you came back he left to go on a trip, contacted you once and then when he came back even less contact. When he would come over he left early or fell asleep. So after all of this you ask him what's happening because it's been two years and before the contact stopped talked about getting married. He says it's nothing that he loves you so much and can't wait to get married. Now it's been three weeks since you've been back and texts are going unanswered and so are messages unless he wants to contact you. He says everything is good. After all of this do you think you can now start to snoop to figure out what's happening or do you just wait until he says what's happening?Also another quick question he wants an engagement gift of the same value of my ring. I find it weird, I've never heard of this before.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (22 July 2011):
 I would ask him what's going on. Do not snoop. If his answer does not satisfy you... then hold off on the engagement.. It may be nothing or maybe he met someone else... he may not tell you if he did and if he does not have a plausible answer as to why his behavior has changed perhaps you will not be satisfied.
As for an engagement gift worth the cost of your ring... umm never heard of such precise record keeping but when my bf and I committed to each other (the non-marriage version of an engagement) he got me a gorgeous piece of jewelery (not a ring) and I got him a ring. I make more money than he does and yet he spent more on my piece than I on his not that it matters to us... We never took into account how much we were spending on him vs on me... we just went with the pieces of jewelery we liked.
A
female
reader, VSAddict +, writes (22 July 2011):
 Don't snoop. Just ask him directly what's going on. This isn't normal and you deserve an explanation. If he's not willing to go back to the way things were and give you the attention you need, maybe you should leave.
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