A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: My partner and I are both college students and we have to be apart during the breaks. I've noticed that while at first I miss her a lot, I gradually start to miss her less and less as the break progresses. Is this because I'm starting to love her less or is it simply temporary? I'm worried because it feels like I'm losing emotion and I don't know if this "distancing" feeling is permanent in any way. Also, we have been together for two months so I'm worried this is too soon to be apart for a month at a time. Is being apart something we should delay until we've been together for a certain time period or will it always feel like this no matter how much we put it off?
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female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (2 December 2010):
Well, I'm married to a military guy, and time apart is kind of the norm. And yes, everytime he leaves I am really bummed out at first and miss him horribly. But then as time goes on, I adjust more to being alone and while I miss him - I know I'll see him again, and I just get on with life in the meantime. I don't think that missing her less necessarily means that you love her less or that the love is fading. If you still feel attracted to her and excited to see each other, then you should be okay.
However, we've been together for 6 years. You and yours have only been together for 2 months! Your relationship is brand new! I don't think that means it's doomed though. It just needs a little extra attention - try writing letters to each other, Skyping...
If this is just a college break and you'll be together soon, it's not a huge deal. I wouldn't worry too much. Good luck!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2010): This is why I am not a supporter of long distance relationships. People need to be in person, to make eye contact and feel each other's physical comfort... humans need touch!!
If you two are continuing your relationship when apart through conversing on the phone regularly or on videochat programs such as Skype, your missing her less would be explained. If not, it is the distance that is making you forget her and you need to make a point to keep more in contact. Love doesn't die, but relationships become rather difficult to maintain if you neglect them.
-Tante Victoria
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