A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i have been unable to get aroused, as im very scared of losing my virginity because of the pain.yes i love my partner and am absoloutely ready. just need suggestions on how to overcome the fear. im getting old. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, kirra07 +, writes (30 January 2011):
For overcoming your fear, first, as others have said, be comfortable with your partner. Tell him that you are scared, and talk about how you can make this as painless and not scary as possible. Plan to start slow, with fingering until you are comfortable with that level. Then to progress to sex with the use of lube and moving slowly. Also, remember that the world is full of women that have lost their virginity and have come to love sex. Yes, it can be painful (more painful to some), but it is also not painful for some others. Just remember that the end goal is what you are looking for - sex that is not painful for you and is enjoyable, and furthering intimacy with your partner. The pain does not last, and if you are careful and gentle, need not be that much pain to begin with. Good luck.
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