A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:We've become good friends over the past few months, very good friends. But, she remembers everything about me, all the little things, she lets me touch her and tickle her, something that I don't even do with my best friend of many years.I really like her but I'm afraid to make the first move because I don't want to lose the friendship. However, I've only known her for a year and we only became good friends maybe 3-4 months ago. Also, she is 4 years older than me.I had this idea, I know one of her good friends, what if I see this friend, make her promise not to tell anyone and then ask her her what this girl thinks about me. Tell her that I'm thinking of asking her to be my girlfriend and what she thinks of that idea. Is that good or bad?
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male
reader, GoodDog  +, writes (7 August 2011):
 Yes, I would say to bypass the friend and go straight to the girl you like. This will show her you are confident and serious about asking her out.
You could go to her friend and do it that way, but then the girl you like might just sit back and wait for you to ask anyway. So, going straight to your lady is the bet way to go and, as I said, she might even be flattered by it.
It doesn't matter that you all work together. I've been in relationships with girls from work before and it was never a problem - except for annoying the bosses for not getting our work done due to chatting, etc!
Don't let anything put you off. If you really do like this girl then go for it otherwise you might hold back too long and lose your chance.
Fingers crossed for ya! Let us know how it goes.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your answers. I just have something to add, would it complicate things if me, this girl and her best friend all work together part-time retail?
And so your consensus is to just straight up tell her, bypass the best friend?
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A
male
reader, GoodDog +, writes (4 August 2011):
Why not just ask her directly if she would like to go out with you to the cinema, park, shopping, etc? Nothing too formal or serious, but something you could both enjoy.
You can then find out a bit more about how she feels and take it from there!
I don't think you'll lose the friendship with her by asking her out - she might be flattered by your offer.
If she does say No, then don't be too down about it and show that you still want to be friends with her.
Go for it!
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A
female
reader, xTheAlmightyDuckx +, writes (4 August 2011):
 Hey, Well when i had my bestfriend who was a girl i would tell her everything, so it depends if you can trust the girl you like bestfreind as normanally girls to tend to tell eachother everything.
Maybe you should flirt with her abit and see how she reacts give her the odd hug every now and then and see if she likes it and doesnt want to let go, even use a flirty joke or a pickup line. See how she reacts and if you get good signs then i would maybe invite her out of a date and ask her out then.
Best of luck x
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A
male
reader, jijo varghese  +, writes (4 August 2011):
dont take superfast decesion , take yor time, if she hav an idea of loving yo she wot go anyver . and if she doesnt hav anything or she need nothing other than ur friendship. ur decesion go bad, turns bad, may hav chance to loose her , dont mak any move now take time, thinkmore , know her more try to know her wots in her mind. and then carry on with ur decesion, and age doesnt matter for love. dont worry about that , but try to know the suitation in ur home,for the age matter . take decesion accordingly . pls write to me with more details
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2011): My boyfriend asked my bestfriend before he asked me out... but saying that, we were 16 at the time and are now 20.
You're 22-25, right? Just explain to her how you feel! Confidence is very attractive, especially to an older woman! You said you've only been good friends for the past few months, so you'll be able to get past it if she doesn't feel the same. You've still lots to learn about each other!
Be confident, and go for it!
Good luck and keep us posted! x
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