A
male
age
36-40,
*iser
writes:Maybe its her who is afraid of commitment maybe its me, but as the relationship seems to get more serious she asks for more space. We see each other only once or twice a week at the moment. I ask her to see me and she rejects me usally saying she would rather stay and chill at home with her family or go out with her freinds dancing with men. As I try to get closer she pulls away further, yet when i give her what she wants she comes running back. Confusing... What do i do? Not reply to texts when she texts me do not ring her...Its a confusing situation. GF is 17 ( going on 18 ) iam going on 21
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2007): Mine isnt exactly an answer to you problem...
Well, the thing is, am in a similar situation as you. Am crazy about someone who was my senior at college. We are both crazy about each other. We have the most wonderful time together. She seems to be so afraid to commit. Of late she keeps talking about us being friends, not that am forcing her into it. she asked me where I place her in my life & I honestly told her that am hoping that our frienship would develop into something special & she said she felt the same.I've been a real gentle man.She seems to pullaway sometimes, it hurts so bad.
When I give her space, she says I am neglecting her. She sends texts saying that she misses being in my arms & being held by me. Its so confusing... and frustrating.
Man... I feel your pain & frustration..
A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (9 February 2007):
 Wow! Does she really say "she would rather stay and chill at home with her family or go out with her freinds dancing with men?" I think that's your answer don't you?
I think she enjoys the attention from you, then when you leave it for a bit and give her the space she "plays games" with you, hence the texts you receive from her. This girl is a player love, don't rise to it! She is playing with your emotions and feels she has you wrapped around her little finger.
Next time she says "are you missing me?" or similar (wanting her ego boosted) say "No" or "haven't actually had time to think about you today," something in that vein and you'll see the difference.
Eve
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