A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have a couple of questions.First and foremost, my fiance and I have only been having sex for a couple of weeks now. We were originally waiting to be married but it randomly kind of happened one night. That aside, he finds it less romantic and meaningful to use a condom-which I do kind of agree with. However, I'm waiting for a student loan check to come in before I can afford birth control, so he's been using the pull-out method.He has A LOT of self control when it comes to sexual matters. He waits until I'm fully satisfied, and holds back himself. After I'm satisfied, he completely pulls out and finishes himself off by hand with my assistance. He prevents himself from getting too near to ejaculation at all. He doesn't wait until he's about to cum before pulling out-he pulls out WELL before he gets close. However,I was trying to read up about pre-ejaculation fluid and haven't found much help on the subject because some research says theres no sperm in it at all, some say there's a little, some say there's a lot...some research says its impossible to get pregnant by that alone while other sources state it's possible but very unlikely or that it's equally as possible as with semen. So does it or doesn't it contain sperm and where can I find accurate, up to date information about the subject? Links or responses from medical professions would be helpful!My second question is this: I feel guilty about reaching orgasm sometimes because for some reason, I have a lot of them in a row where he has only one. Is it normal to have several orgasms in a row?
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condom, ejaculation, fiance, orgasm, semen, sperm Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2008): Pulling out is not safe because the pre-ejaculate can contain sperm. It doesn't contain sperm naturally, it is produced by the cowper's gland and not the testicles, but can pick up leftover sperm in his urethra from recent ejaculations. You are taking a chance by using this method alone. My husband and I used withdrawal for almost 3 years when we first got married. He too always pulled out before ejaculation and finished up on a towel or on my stomach. We thought we were ok and then..........we now have a son. It will eventually fail. Choose a more reliable method of birth control. There are a lot of options on the market these days. Multiple orgasms are not uncommon in women. If you are experiencing them, count yourself among the lucky ones! There's no need to feel guilty. It's completely natural, just as it is for a man to have a single orgasm. Nature made you that way, so relax and enjoy it.
A
male
reader, ChiRaven +, writes (29 July 2008):
 Pulling out is just playing mommy roulette. It's not at all safe. Take it from there.
As far as orgasms are concerned, what you're experiencing is perfectly normal, and you have no cause to feel guilty. Get as many as you can!
But if your guy is as disciplined as you say, he's missing out on the prospect of having more than one himself. There are techniques involving muscular training and control that allow a man to reduce his refractory period to as little as ten or fifteen minutes. Basically what he does is, instead of letting everything out at once, he controls things so that he starts his orgasm, but controls his ejaculation, that is, controls the amount that he allows to come out, through muscular control. It may not feel quite the same as "letting it rip", but it's really good, and being able to do it over and over again more than makes up for the difference in the sensation. As I say, this method does take a lot of discipline and a lot of training (he's got to build up the right muscles to be able to do that control), but it really does work.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2008): Pre ejaculate, or precum, does not contain sperm. However, a man can begin the real ejaculation either before or after his orgasm begins, sometimes several seconds before. They do not start at the same time, although it is normally close enough to seem the same. It may be difficult for him to realize that he has started the actual ejaculation early and as a result, he will not pull out in time. In conclusion, the pull out method is not effective. It's like the old joke: What do you call people who use the rhythmm method? - Parents.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2008): My wife only has 1 orgasm during intercourse and very rarely 2, but she can have 4 or 5 with oral sex. A woman who I used to date could only have 1 orgasm and she liked it to be with oral sex, as it was very intense.
Yes, you women should feel guilty that you can have multiple orgasms when us guys can only have one. HE-HE, just kidding. Enjoy it and don't feel guilty. I get enjoyment watching my wife have multiple orgasms. But then again, she sometimes tells me to just screw her and have my own fun without concentrating on her enjoyment. That's what a happy marriage is all about, caring about the other.
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (29 July 2008):
 A great Aunt named "Tisha" posted this a couple days ago. The girl had a question similar to yours. THIS VIDEO IS SO GREAT!! It's funny, informative and will answer your questions about pulling out and even other sex questions.
http://websrvr40nj.audiovideoweb.com/avwebdsnjwebsrvr4501/portal/media/media-050516-pregnancy.html
As for your multiple orgasms, it's totally normal - though not typical - you're very lucky to get them. It doesn't mean that you're unhealthy or anything, just means that you're very fortunate.
Watch that video. It was hilarious and even I learned a little sumthinsumthin. Hope it helps, sweetness!
xx India
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A
male
reader, Sandman +, writes (29 July 2008):
 http://http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12762415?dopt=Abstract
Please read the information in the link provided above. This is all I'm going to say. The last time I said something my rates dropped 33 points in one day.
Hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite  +, writes (28 July 2008):
 oh ps i agree with uncle sneaker not all women can achieve multipul orgasms so we are truly gifted lol.. enjoy it whilst it lasts xx aphex
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (28 July 2008):
no the pull out method is not good the chance are high usually people call them parents..not to blow my head but i can have up to 9 orgasms in less that 10 minutes hehehe dont feel bad its wonderful, i wonder if i could get much more hrm oops anyhoo lol back to the topic at hand...ok some say it can work but alot of others find out their pregnant..so if you dont want to get pregnant even though you may already be i would stop till you get birth control..ive read that it can work for some but most people fail..get yourself checked out for pregnancie and if your not quit while your ahead unless you want to be parents .. best wishes aphexy xxx
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A
male
reader, Uncle Sneaker +, writes (28 July 2008):
 Quite definitely, positively, 100% confirmed, you are MORE likely to get pregnant if he pulls out before ejaculation than if he doesn't.
It is not a "safe method of contraception". Quite the reverse.
Sperm IS released before ejaculation. Sperm released before ejaculation is MORE LIKELY to get you pregnant than the flood released by ejaculation.
Go get a pregnancy test. And buy some condoms. Good grief, they cost about the same as a bottle of fizzy drink, don't they? So that's about ten thousand times less than the cost of having a baby and bringing up a child.
And your second question:
Yes it's normal, but not all women do. From my experience, most don't (hey! but it may be I'm not good enough at what I do to them). You're a lucky girl.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2008): It isn't necessarily normal to have several orgasms in a row but its entirely possible; its a multiple orgasm and well done to your boyfriend for being able to satisfy you so well! :P Theres no reason for you to feel guilty unless you have to make him do it for you, which I doubt happens. I'm afraid I can't really tell you much about pre-ejaculation fluid, its something I worry about myself but I am on the pill. It sounds like you are very intelligent and aware of your safety, I would say there is a slim chance of pregnancy if he withdraws wayyyy before he gets close and I agree with your views on condoms but its unwise to have no protection whatsoever. Not only is it a shame that he cannot reach orgasm during sex (I always feel bad when I have to take this approach when I come off the pill) but its risky. While using the withdrawal method before you get the pill, why don't you try using spermicide to control the risk of the pre ejaculation fluid? You can get it in most pharmacies. Good luck hun!! xxx
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