A
female
age
41-50,
*risstin
writes:Hi Thanks all of your time. Dear AllI with my BF have been together around 2 years. We are stay together about 2 years, He is a Swiss guy (from Switzerland), and I am Asian girl (Chinese).We were break up with 2 month+ ago. I was confused and think that is my boyfriend lie to me or cheating me? I need some advice. 1. When we together he was always say he is busy cannot go to bed early, is that true? Almost every day he is tired and when is weekend, he say he tired too, Is he finding a reason to leave me?2. When is weekend, I want to go out, he will ask if I have money to go out or not? is that normal to ask this?3. Is that normal after he break up with his ex-gf, and his still call her “stuff” and she call him “honey”, is that normal? 4. He always buy a gift for her (ex-gf), and chat with her 2 times/per week, when I know it, he keep lie, or explain this is normal for him and her. And scold me, ask me don’t ask a lot. Is that really normal? Is that really is a culture in Switzerland?5. Is that normal the men ask the girl to stay at factory? Is because he is a managing director but no money? Is that true? 6. I have to buy him a electronic cooker plate and toaster and the cheese oven, and now we break up, he say this all belonging I have to pay him back money when during we together all the money we spend, otherwise he don’t give me back all the thing I bought, is that normal? This culture is in Switzerland?7. Is that normal, BF always talk to GF fuck off ?8. Is that normal, BF say to the GF, I need to save the money go to Thailand for holiday, only can pay the GF food for more of the night was 0.70USD? is his greedy?9. Is that normal that the BF say to the GF, his ex-gf are more important than the GF? This is Switzerland culture?10. Is that normal for a friendship in Switzerland, the men(friend) always call her ex-gf (sweet) and buy gift for her all the time and help her as much as she request? Is this culture in Switzerland?11. Is that normal BF talk to GF , better you don’t follow me go to Thailand or go back to my country(Switzerland), because in Switzerland the girl are not like this. Is that normal in Switzerland?12. Is that normal the BF say to the GF, I lie to you, is because you will argue with me for I talk to my ex-gf in the midnight and few hours. Is that normal for the men to say like this?13. Is that normal the BF says all the time to the gf, I have no money, you want to invite me?14. Is that normal the BF asking me how much I can save per month of my money? 15. Is that normal BF hug the Thailand girl and say I love you, but he cannot say to GF, is that normal?16. Is that normal the BF always telling the GF, to pay for the shopping and cinema money? In Switzerland is like this. Is a mean the girl pay food and the men pay a cinema ticket?17. Is that right the BF say he have pay me half ticket was (USD550.00) to Switzerland. So when he back I have to pay him food, bus ticket travel hotel to replace what he pay for me. Is that normal in Swiss country?18. My BF always talks to a girl in any country, he always say is the girl likes to chat with him, is not his fault. But I have tell him, maybe you could tell the girl say, you girlfriend is waiting of you, chat next time. But he say, is the girl fault don’t want to let he go. Is that true? He lies? This is already happen much time. They are not short talk, can be take time half an hour’s or 1 hour or more. Is that normal in Swiss country and let the girl wait. And the girlfriend cannot be angry. Is that normal?19. Is that normal my bf tell the ex-gf my personal thing and my finance everything to her. And let her know my phone number and she insulting me and my parent and my friend. And my BF just says yes, the ex-gf is right to scold me and insulting me. is that right in Switzerland country?20. Is that the BF always asks the GF got money to have sex or got money to buy a condom or food. Is he is nice guy? 21. Is that normal my BF tell me his ex-gf is consider of his family?All above the issue is normal in Switzerland country?
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condom, her ex, his ex, I love you, money, my ex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2009): You are being used and taken for a fool. His behavior, especially with your money, is stealing from you.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2009): Dear Dear girl
I am really sorry for you because you have been had by a real asshole. The answer to all your questions is NO it is not like that in switzerland or in any land. just dump this manipulating bully and don't give hime a cent more and be tough with him and get all your belongings from even if it means going to the police. you have to leave him because he is not good for you and he will only harm your feelings and your pocket if you stay with him. I am sure there is a nice person somewhere out there for you. but this asshole doesn't deserve you. Be happy.
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A
female
reader, Angzw  +, writes (15 December 2009):
This behaviour is not normal ANYWHERE in the world. He is treating you BADLY. He is LYING to you. You need a NEW man to treat you better. Dont give him your money. Just tell him its over.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2009): Hello. Youve asked this sort of thing before and you know it isnt normal. If you thought it was, you wouldnt feel the need to ask. Your boyfriend or ex boyfriend hasnt been treating you properly. In any culture if theres love, you will be looked after and respected by your partner. It isnt normal for him to be up untill late at night chatting to other women. Its not normal for him to expect you to pay for things for him, unless youve both agreed first. Some people do still stay friends with an ex partner but its not normal to put the ex partner before you. He shouldnt be telling her all your financial business or giving her your phone number ect. He wasnt being honest with you and he didnt treat you properly. If you two are aparted now its best to leave things and move on. Find someone who makes you feel special, treats you with respect and doesnt put their ex partner before you. The way he treated you had nothing to do with the fact that he was Swiss and came from Switzerland. How he reated you was wrong and if he treated a Swiss woman like he treated you, she would be unhappy and leave.
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