A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Friends,Me and my wife are very god friends and talk about any of our feelings each other. Some two years back I have spoke to her about couple swap or threesome she was also interested in and had similar fantasies. Now that we know there are risks involved and are at times talking about it. The reality is that we are longing for it. We want to experience the feeling once. Are there any friends who experienced it. What are the real pros and cons. What are the precautions to be taken. My wife says we should talk to one of our couple friends and enact it. My feeling is to find somebody who is a stranger and do it once and forget.
View related questions:
threesome Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 June 2016): Female Anonymous said all there is to say.There it is.Best answer. Listen to her!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 June 2016): What is wrong with people nowadays?What is this going to accomplish OP? Really? WHAT??? I can assure you it will be NOTHING like you pictured it. NOTHING like you thought it would be in your fantasy. NOTHING. Porns script these things. It is all perfect in those scenarios. Because everybody is performing. For an audience. They are putting it all on. Faking it. In real life, it is not this smooth and easy or passion filled. And don't forget none of those actors have feelings for anyone else. It's free and easy. Feelings complicate. They change everything. It will never be a level playing field.Can you watch your wife go at it with some other guy? What if he has a bigger d*ck than you do? What if he satisfies her way better than you do? Can you stand him being able to make her orgasm over and over? Maybe do it better than you??? Could you stand it??? Will you not hate her for it? Hold onto resentment? And what about you? Think she can handle watching you pleasure another woman? Have intercourse with her? I mean, if you do that, how can you really love your wife? To subject her to THAT? Would you NOT feel guilty at all? How could you even enjoy it? She may say she is okay with it. But you don't know what will happen once what seemed like a good idea becomes well, not such a good idea. Once it's in motion and in real life, it becomes something altogether different. And emotions you THOUGHT you could handle will surface. And the scenario you THOUGHT you could handle will turn ugly.You are flirting with disaster OP!Want to ruin your marriage?No faster way than having a THREESOME! Or swapping partners!This is just a way to get the green light without CHEATING! But the OUTCOME will be the EXACT SAME THING! Consider that you will have cheated on each other. And deal with the fallout. THERE WILL BE RESENTMENT, JEALOUSY, ANGER, SADNESS, BITTERNESS... on and on and on and on.JUST NOT WORTH IT.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2016): thank you all. replies are appropriate to think about.
...............................
A
male
reader, Serpico  +, writes (24 June 2016):
Threesomes are a great idea in a committed relationship, if you no longer want to have a committed relationship.
...............................
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (22 June 2016):
 Here are the "pros and cons".....
There a remote - tiny - chance that you and she can go through with this and it will be successful....
There's a MAJOR chance that it will lead to the demise of your marriage.....
Think of it this way... You say: "Let's walk on the railroad tracks while a train is coming toward us. It could be exciting to jump out of the way at the last moment...." And she says;; "That sounds like fun... but WHY would we bother to jump out of the way... I'm sure the train will veer away to avoid us"....
Ain't likely to happen. WHY - oh, WHY - do some people believe that they have to "tickle the dragon's tail" in order to make life "good"?????
Good luck.... (see you in divorce court)....
...............................
A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (22 June 2016):
 Some things sound good in fantasies and it's a great way of spicing things up by just taking about it... But I strongly suggest that you keep it at that.
Have a look at this post from not too long ago and you'll see why.
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/threesome-gone-wrong-and-i-feel-so-cheated.html
...............................
A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts  +, writes (22 June 2016):
 Sometimes, this works out well for people, but rarely. You have to be prepared for your relationship to break down and not be reparable, if you go ahead with this.
The pros?
It *can* spice up your sex life.
The cons? (*much* more common than the pros!)
It can cause jealousy.
It can easily end even strong relationships.
It can cause paranoia.
It doesn't often just happen once, which causes tension.
You'd be playing with fire. I *really* wouldn't advise it if you love each other and want to stay together.
...............................
A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (22 June 2016):
There is will never be a just once.
If you do the wrong thing and get away with it, you will want to do it again.
Pros....NONE...it may seem like lots of fun at first...but then comes the part neither one of you will enjoy.
Cons....Wife may like the other man more than you. She could become very jealous of the other woman, or you jealous of the other man.... Divorce.... Tension between both of you. Mistrust and wondering if you are thinking of the other woman while you are with her, or you thinking she is fantasising about the other man while she is with you.
What if you want to stop at just one time and she does not? Or the other way around.
Consider it like cancer...No one goes out and brings cancer into their lives. This act could eat away at your relationship, until there is nothing left.
Fantasies are great for spicing up a relationship. But a relationship based on two people should stay two people. Bringing others into it, is looking for trouble.
Fantasise all you want...but leave it at just fantasy.
...............................
|
