A
female
age
30-35,
*ockwood11
writes:How do I find a boyfriend? Iv only slept with two people and they weren't even my boyfriends, they got what they wanted and left me. Iv been used twice now and just want a boyfriend who'll want me for me, not just my body. Are there any men like that anymore Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Cloverfield +, writes (11 August 2010):
 I think the key is, find someone that wants to be with you whether sex is involved or not. Sadly, if memory serves correctly, boys of your age think of little else.
A
male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (11 August 2010):
 Friendship and love "first" are fine concepts, but in your age bracket, you simply must try to understand that a lot of experimentation and exploration occurs prior to success. That's true for the vast majority in the Western world.
I'm much older now, but once was your age, and you can take it or leave it that not much has changed - certainly in the last 40 years and reportedly in the last several thousand. Prior to that we were, well, who knows? It seems today's teens and young adults may be even friskier than we were in the 1960s-70s, which is hard for me to imagine, but I'm out of the picture now. The overall morality that was prevalent at times appears to have dipped for the time being, but shifts with generations. The answer to your question is that you will likely have to be extremely selective if you wish to find a lasting mate.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (11 August 2010):
 I'm sure there are guys out there who would want a real relationship, not just to use a girl.
TAKE your time getting to know a guy. Figure out if YOU like him. Figure out if he likes you for you, or just wants sex.
TAKE the time to figure out WHAT your own limit, morals, values and ideas are and look for someone with some of the same traits. Some one you can SHARE things with. Not a guy who needs a lot of "fixing up". It never works, you just can't "fix" anyone but yourself. ;)
My first BF and I waited 6 months before we had sex. It was partly because we didn't really have much opportunity but also because I wanted to make sure that this was a guy I wanted to spend time with. We didn't last forever - but we did last 4 1/2 pretty darn good years. ;)
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A
female
reader, kayjaydeex +, writes (11 August 2010):
of course there is , my advice would be to get yourself a nice boyfriend and if hes willing to wait a few months before you get intimate you know that he wont waste your time x
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A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (10 August 2010):
 There are still guys out there. When you meet a guy form a friendship out of dating and give him at least a three month wait before sex. The right guy for you will be willing to wait, any others can just be tossed because you already know what they are only interested in.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): Not all guys are the same, you just haven't found that special person YET.
You can prevent yourself from being used by men, don't sleep with them. Save yourself for someone who you care about and who cares about you. This will make it special, so set yourself some boundaries.
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A
female
reader, petina1 +, writes (10 August 2010):
 Don't sleep with someone who isnt your boyfriend or who you hardly know. The key is to make friends first and find out if this is the special one for you. Anyone can sleep with anyone but a sustainable long lasting relationship is based on friendship and love. You will never find that if you don't hold back a bit more. Hope this helps.
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