A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I moved to Ireland 4 months back to be with my wife . I'm 33, she is 30. I'm still holding Pakistani nationality and soon will be Ireland citizen thanks to my wife. I always like experimenting with my look: One month I will have French Cut beard and next month everything will be gone. I have lost my hair . So I also shave my head. Sometimes, I totally shave it. Sometimes, I leave few hair on my head. She was kind of a upset yesterday , asking me who am I? Why I'm so uncomfortable in my skin? Why I can't be myself? Why I don't let her get used to one look of mine? She also said it seems I'm too excited, like a kid, being in a open society like Ireland . She kissed me and then gave me smile. People, I would like to know that are girls not easy with a guy experimenting too much with his look? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Spaghetti  +, writes (24 July 2013):
I don't see why she would have a problem with you changing your look. Unless she thinks you are cheating?It's like when girls go to the hair salon and try new looks! I'm sure your wife does it too!I don't understand why people tell you to stop changing your look for a while. If you moved to a free society, it is normal you want to revel in your look and try what works better for you!I would talk to your wife , explaining how different society yours was and you are trying to assimilate and see what works better Also, include her , ask her for suggestions for her favorite style, or what she sees as more flattering. Enjoy yourself, not only women do it. If I can wear my hair any way I want everyday you certainly can too.
A
female
reader, jadedpearl +, writes (24 July 2013):
 I think you should stick with the same look generally and change it up every now in then just don't change it every day! Women like consistency but also variety, so if you want to try something new go ahead but always stay the same you inside. Ask her what she likes best and wear it that way the majority of the time. All the other times, change it up how you like. She's going to change too, she will cut her hair short and then decide to grow it out for years, then maybe change the color, get highlights, etc.....
Change is good but too much change makes us think you are being insecure with yourself and are unhappy. Women want confident men.
Good luck and enjoy Ireland!!!!!!!!
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A
female
reader, shrodingerscat +, writes (24 July 2013):
 You should be asking your wife if she's okay with it, instead of wondering what other women think. Your wife's opinion is a LOT more important than ours.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2013): They aren't comfortable when you seem to change too frequently. They have to get used to one look, before you change to another. They get confused; wondering why you can't seem to settle on a style that suits you. Especially if you're more meticulous about your appearance than they are.
You're in Europe, so the they may not use the term "Metro-sexual." That's usually a guy who is fussy about his style and appearance. He uses hair and skin-care products, and is usually aware of the latest male-fashion trends. Some women equate them to being gay. That is not really the case, but bigoted minds are pretty small. They lack logic and defy reason. Some guys just like to look cool. Especially, if they are blessed with good-looks.
Take her opinions into account. She wants to appreciate you for being you. Changing your appearance a lot, may be due to an underlying insecurity.
You are living in Ireland. Where most people are Caucasian, and you don't see the diversity you might see in the Western or Asian hemispheres.
Subconsciously, I suspect you feel out of place. You're avoiding looking too ethnic. I know you also want a sexy appearance as well. It's the frequency and how drastically you're changing, that may add some merit to my speculation.
The only problem I think women would have is why you do it?
If they know you're just experimenting, they'll still roll their eyes; but they may not like sleeping with a stranger every night. Being a gay man, I'm more understanding and flexible in this area. Women usually like something unique about their man. Something dependable and his own signature.
As long as your lady has no problem with it, continue. If she comes out and says she doesn't like a particular look,
heed her advice. She has to look at it and live with it.
There are only so many options you have anyway. Just don't get crazy or too extreme. Don't tattoo your eyebrows or the top of your head. Oops! I better stop!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2013): It's not about girls in general. It should be about your wife.
Sit down and talk to her about it
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