A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Its been 9 months since my ex broke up with me. A part of me always foolishly held onto the hope of her coming back. Any hope I had stopped when she found a new boyfriend. I'm not mad at her about it. I want her to be happy and if she finds happiness with this new guy then good for her. The problem that I have is that I can't seem to forgive myself for the mistakes I made with her and I can't seem to forgive myself for being so wrong about her and I (I thought she was the one and was obviously wrong about that). Most days I feel like I should just give up on finding someone. I'm 23 and I've only had the one girlfriend (we started dating when I was 22). I've always been really shy so I don't meet many people. I want to be in a relationship but I just don't see it happening again. I know I'm young and have a lot of time, but that doesn't give me any comfort. Maybe giving up is for the best. Any comments are appreciated.
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male
reader, The Realist +, writes (11 January 2010):
Take some time to figure out and forgive yourself. Give yourself the credit you deserve and then get out into the world and keep your eyes open for the right girl, she'll show up in time. You should never give up on finding someone. I know 50 to 60 year old men who still found girlfriends and no they are not gold digger's, they are both the same age and want the companionship. Take up some activity that you enjoy and that gets you out to meet new people so that way the person you do meet will atleast have one common interest to start off on.
Best of luck to you.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (11 January 2010):
The only comfort I can give is that I didn't have much luck with women after splitting from my ex, then I decided I'd focus on my life for a while, and now I've met someone. The point is, rather the worrying about the past and worrying about meeting someone right not, just focus on yourself. Go out, meet people, join a club or something where other women might be and just have some fun. When you least expect it, she'll walk into you.
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