A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend has recently started suffering from premature ejaculation. Have been with him for almost 2 years and things were great, we used to have marathon sessions but for the past 2 months, he lasts for about 2 minutes, if that, and then he comes. Im worried that he is going off me. He said it happened once before with his soon to be ex wife (he left her when she cheated on him) and it only stopped when they split up. He says its nothing to do with me but he feels unhealthy and hates his beer gut and now he is always worrying about pleasing me and not coming too quickly. Ive told him I love him as he is and he has never disappointed me in the bedroom but he just says hes not happy with himself. When I first met him he did used to go to the gym several times a week but now does nothing. He smokes quite a lot and has at least a few beers every evening. He has put on weight since we met but is this the real reason or do you think he has stopped fancying me? Im happy with our sex life but he is getting angry at himself and frustrated.
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ejaculation, ex-wife, sex life, smokes, split up Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, honeyross +, writes (25 February 2007):
The more you and your boyfriend worry about this, the more of an issue it will become.
You're worried about him not fancying you, and he's worried about not pleasing you - and you both might be attributing the 'atmosphere' in the bedroom to your own worries, rather than the countless other reasons there could be.
If you tell him he's never disappointed you he may not believe you, considering that he's probably in a low mental state. A lot of sex therapists recommend creating as comfortable an environment as possible where the attention is taken off orgasm and placed more on closeness and intimacy.
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