A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I suffer from high anxiety, and have for a while now. It is mostly related to the stress of college and academics. I also occasionally get panic attacks.I have suffered in my grades because of this, but I am doing my best. It's a process, and I'm trying to get better.My dad does not understand this. While he tries to be supportive, whenever the topic is mentioned, he always says I need to "get over it" or says "You've had this for years now. Time to get yourself together, all you do is procrastinate" When I explain what a panic attack feels like, his response is always some variation of "your generation is all messed up. we never had that in my time." I feel even worse when these conversations end. How can I encourage him to treat me like an adult and respect my condition? Outside of my anxiety, I have a normal life, a job, goals, etc. Yet he makes me feel I am lazy... Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (12 April 2013):
 Ah so you are getting help! GOOD!
could your doctor/therapist have a session with dad to get him out of this old school mindset?
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2013): Regardless of the results, it appears your your father means well.
I suffered from anxiety for many years. After a lot of soul searching, I found it was a gap between what I expected ( or was raised to expect) and what was happening. \
Find a professional and be 100% honest with yourself and with them. No matter what it is talk about it, face it, let it out, address it. Don't let it elude you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2013): I found an awesome user on youtube recently who has a similar condition her username is snowflake891000. Her vlog is pretty cool. OP what do you expect of him and what benefit do you hope to achieve? He sounds old school, he's probably not going to ever understand it at all. I mean it sounds as if he's doing his best to supportive but can't relate.
OP it sounds to me like he's pushing you to succeed the only way he knows how. The last thing he's trying to do is make you feel lazy or inept.
Try and not let his version of support get you down, understand his motives, the meaning and let his approach slide. Maybe try creating your own vlog and send him links to the videos. Give him a view inside your mind that he can watch without you present, that way he wont feel the need to offer a practical response. He can just listen.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2013): Hello,
As a former anxiety sufferer, I feel your pain.
Unfortunately, many people are unsympathetic because they have never had to deal with the daily horror of panic and anxiety. It isn't something you can just "get over." It requires therapy and lots of hard work to overcome. Many people are a fan of medication, but that never really addresses the underlying issues. It only masks them.
To be honest, it sounds like you really are doing the best you can at the moment.You should be feeling proud of what you're accomplishing.
Now for your dad...
My dad thought the same things. The best thing you can do is take him to a therapy session with you. The therapist could possibly help him see things from your point of view. If you don't go to therapy, then you can google articles about anxiety for him to read.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2013): I am in fact, getting help for my condition. Have to disagree with Sageoldguy though. Mental illness wouldnt exist if we could all just "buck up and face life." Same goes for depression.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (11 April 2013):
what does your doctor say to you about this?
because unless you are in treatment with a professional for your anxiety (therapy and medication) then I'm with dad and Sageoldguy....
An adult would be working with a medical professional and a therapist to get past the anxiety issues... if you are not doing that then you are not behaving as a responsible adult.
IF you are seeing a doctor and/or therapist then ask them for how to best help dad understand your problems.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (11 April 2013):
 I'm "with" your Father...... Buck up and face life..... It isn't going to adjust for your sensitivities...
Good luck....
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