A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ok so I'm 19 and i never had anal sex. my hubby really wants to try it but I'm scared as i have heard its painful. what do u guys think? n i would appreaciate if u would tell me the ways to enjoy it without much pain for the first time!! thanks!! xoxo
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female
reader, heart-shaped-balloon +, writes (5 October 2010):
 It hurt so badly that I cried for hours and we didn't even get it all the way in XD OMG. But I also hated the idea and cried beforehand. I didn't want to do it but tried anyways... And I also have permanent internal damage which caused me a lot of pain because he basically split me open :/But for you it might be different. It really depends. Some women LOVVEE it and others hate it. If you are comfortable with the idea, I say go for it. You never know until you try. Make sure you, ahem, flush your bowels out beforehand though. An enema will keep the whole thing from becoming embarrassing. Use lots and LOTS of lube, and make sure he gently stretches you out a bit using fingers beforehand. Make sure he uses a condom as the tissue is very very delicate in there and infection is easy to get. Relax as much as you can, and make sure he goes very slow at first. If it hurts, have him stop where he is and wait before continuing. And don't do it too often- it can make you unable to control your bathroom habits. Good luck!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2010): First off it is your decision so dont let anyone pressure you into it, not even your husband.
You can look at it like this if you really want to try it for him, you only have to try it once and at least you can say you tried if you dont like it. Also, the world has so much to offer in the way of sexual gratification, exploring something like this with someone you trust could turn into a really fun thing. Theres really no harm in trying, right?
Being a female who is fond of this type of sexual play, I can give you some advice if you do decide youd like to try it. Firstly, make sure you dont have to go to the bathroom, the male can feel if you have stuff up there which can lead to infections as well as being a little awkward for you. I would suggest buying a butt plug from a local (or online) sex shop. You should use lubrication of course. With my experience, it is often not painful at all if you wear one of these for some amount of time before actually going any further with your husband. I usually wear one for about 15 minutes but it may be different depending on the person. Also, if you'd rather not buy one of those, you can do it without, although it will be painful at first. No matter how many times I have done this, it ALWAYS hurts (a lot) when he first puts it in if I dont use a buttplug first. Use lots of lube. He has to slowly, VERY slowly put it in and slowly take it back out for a few seconds. Once he puts it back in it feels very good. It can even be better than regular sex if you get past the initial pain and try again, at least in my opinion.
A few things to note as well for afterwards:
It will be messy and a little painful afterwards. Since its your first time, there may be a little blood when you are cleaning up, and by a little I mean very little. Some tearing can occur but it will heal in a few days and isnt nearly as terrible as it sounds. The next day you will feel a little sore still but nothing too bad. Just dont be alarmed if feel a slight pain the next day or two. If you do like it, DONT try it again for at least a week or two, this can really hurt and who knows what problems doing this too often may lead to down the road.
I hope this helps and you are able to enjoy yourself! I surely dont regret trying this, it has really spiced up my sex life!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2010): my fiance really enjoys it so i can tell you some of the things we do to make it easier.
1. some kind of lubricant helps
2. dont be affraid of it being messy. i dont think she does any extra cleaning ahead of time and ive never turned up dirty.
3. DONT do anal then have regular sex. you'll get infections and such.
4. if he wants to do anal and you're alright with it then this probably wont be a problem. let him try his fingers first a little. maybe one in the back and one in the front. my fiance, she loves that. but again, dont put that back finger up front.
5. take it slooow at first, and use positions where you'll be in control incase it gets uncomfortable. that way you can stop it or move.
6. have him use a free hand to massage other places.
7. lastly, relax. the more relaxed you are the easier and more fun it will be. though i will say that i dont know if all women do this but when my fiance climaxes durring anal she tightens up so dont worry if that happens.
and thats how we get our enjoyment out of it. she and i both really enjoy it but in the end (no pun intended) it comes down to personal preference.
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A
female
reader, redchevygal +, writes (4 October 2010):
If you want to try it make sure he uses a condom use a good lube and just relax I think relaxing is one of the best ways to help it not hurt tell him to insert him self very slowly it will hurt a little at first but if it hurts a lot then stop the pain should subside to pleasure in seconds. The thought of it was the hardest part for me to get over.
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