A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I don't know what to do. My boyfriend and i want to try anal but im scared. The area around my ass hole and vagina is quite dark, does this honestly matter? im worried that when it comes rouund to it he may be put off. Also, i know this may sound silly but i'm so scared about him entering my anus and then having poo on his willy. Please help me, how do i prevent this? are there any other ways than the enema? i dont want to do that to myself? and do i need to buy anal bleach?does anyone have any experiences with anal bleach? please help. thanks
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2011): Listen to everything missm83 said.You are too young. Save something for the love of your life. Anal sex can be EXTREMELY pleasurable to SOME women(my wife can NOT do without it although i prefer vaginal) but you have to WANT to do it and be very relaxed patient and experienced.Do not listen to people who say it will hurt. Proper anal sex should absolutely positively NEVER hurt, ever.
A
female
reader, missm83  +, writes (6 February 2011):
 your way to young to be trying anal... but if you going to make sure YOU want it not because hes pushing you to want it. i am 27 and this year was the 1st time i had a great anal sex.. my ex before hurt me so much i never wanted to try it again. but i did cuz it was something i knew i wanted if done right. So my way of getting ready was getting a butt plug toy, ones i got use to using this on my self i let my bf use it on me. ones the plug was in all the way i let it stay in place for few min then he would lube up and go in as soon as i removed the plug, it work like a charm! now i cant get enough of anal sex, i have the most amazing orgasms ever.
But way before me and my bf got in to it we talked about what could go wrong orit may get messy. he was ok with it. I have a cleaning routine i do before we have anal. Don't use bleach that's a Porn thing... i actually love how my hole looks ;) and i know he does too. Love your body the way it is and dont try to hurt your self for a boy...one day when you get older you will meet a MAN trust me he will not care about the color of your hole, your vagina he will love every part of your body from head to toe !
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2011): Bleaching only takes care of the outer appearance of it. The pooh cometh whether you bleach ot not.
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A
male
reader, rivi +, writes (6 February 2011):
Lucky bf.
Make sure he uses a lubricated condom plus plenty of lube on the tip of the condom and in yr hole.
And ask him to try introducing his penis as gradually as possible [ tho' that will be difficult for him but he should try. ]
Once he's orgasmed he should make sure to withdraw and discard the condom carefully without letting it touch the area around your vagina.
Report back on yr findings.
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A
female
reader, celtic_tiger +, writes (6 February 2011):
 Just remember that "porn" isn't real sex and the things that the women do in it are often not something that most women would ever condsider doing. Porn stars are paid to do these things and look like they are enjoying them.
You are still only very young, anal sex is something that even older grown and experience women would not consider doing. Ever.
If you dont want to do this, then dont. He wants anal, but do you? It is not him who has to be faced with the pain if he goes too fast and gets too entusiastic. The anus is not like the vagina, it will not naturally expand to accomodate his penis. Also there is no natural lubrication, so if you do decide to go ahead with it, then use as much as you can, and even then it probably wont be enough. SO use more than you think you will need. Does he have enough control to go slowly and stop if you tell him to? Because if he is rough it WILL hurt and you may well bleed and tear your anus.
As the others have said, the risk of infection is much greater through anal sex so make sure he wears a condom.
Here are a few questions from other people about this. I think you need to be more prepared for the reality of this act - and that how is looks doesnt matter to the men.
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/does-anal-sex-hurt.html
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/does-anal-sex-cause-long-term-harm.html
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/is-this-normal-after-anal-sex.html
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/is-it-normal-to-bleed-after-anal-sex.html
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (6 February 2011):
Everyone's anus is pigmented darker. Because it's a muscle the contracts and retracts, the skin is thicker there and therefore, darker pigmented. So don't worry about bleaching your anus; seriously, it's just another reason why porn makes normal women feel bad about themselves. Otherwise, I've heard the bleach can burn your skin and cause scarring if you don't have a professional do it.
Anal sex isn't very pleasureable in my opinion. Some women like it, but I don't get it. Make sure there's a lot of lube and many diseases are passed on through anal sex (much higher than vaginal). Not only diseases that you can contract, but he can also get an infection. So he might want to use a condom...then even if some feces gets on him, it's on the condom.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2011): I've heard of anal bleach, and I actually purchased some. It's not really a bleaching solution, but a natural solution that takes quite some time to work--if it works. I do not recommend this, it was a waste of my money. It is also natural for this part of you to be darker, especially if you are of African American or Hispanic descent. As for anal sex hurting....well, yeah, it's going to hurt. Your anus has two rings, the outer and an inner. The inner ring is usually what causes most of the pain. Try doing some research about it online, and seriously consider if you are ready for this type of interaction. There can be heavily complications to trying sex this way. You have to remember, that the anus was not made for intercourse, so if you do decide to do this, then use tons of water based lube.If your boyfriend gets mad about you not willing to have anal sex at this time, then get rid of him. Anal sex, in some parts of the country, is still considered Taboo. The anus was not made for intercourse, so if you are having doubts, then don't take this plunge until you are more experienced and ready.Best of Luck!
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A
male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (6 February 2011):
 Oh my, I've never heard of anal bleach but that sounds like a terrible idea. Trust me, he's not looking, the appearance of the area has nothing whatever to do with what he's wanting. He's hoping for sensation, and he's intensely grateful that you're willing to let him try. As he should be.
As for the other, as long as you've had a thorough bowel movement a reasonable time before hand there should be no feces in the area so it shouldn't be a problem. However, if he's wanting to do this, he should be aware that it could happen. If that's going to freak him out, he has no business whatever trying anal in the first place. If he can't handle seeing a bit of poo he shouldn't go anywhere near that part of you. You're offering a great gift, but it comes with real-world implications -- if he's not mature enough to deal with those implications, he's not worthy of the gift you're offering.
As for afterward, he should pee right away. And if you're going to do anything else he should wash very thoroughly. Under no circumstances should his penis go from your anus to your vagina (or anywhere else) until he's washed very clean.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2011): I don't know about anal bleaching but I know anal sex can hurt if done carefully. You have to use lubricants. If you don't use it you can tear your anal hole and bleed.
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