A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have a childhood friend on whom I had a huge crush.I met her after 12 years on facebook.. she is studying thousand miles away from me... I proposed her on the 3rd day.. She said no.. Then after one month I sent an expensive leather clutch.. She accepted. but now she's started ignoring me... I couldn't resist that.. and on the 3rd month I sent her another expensive earphone(dr dre) coz she likes music.. This time she told me that she wouldn't accept it.. until I promise not to send her any gifts again.. I said ok.. she accepted it.. One day I was drunk and asked her whether she had a BF.. she said there was a guy she used to like.. after something went wrong and she doesn't even look at him again any more.. At last on her birthday.. I sent a present.. But their no reply... As the courier tracker says it has been delivered... What should I do now... keep trying.. or let it go??? Frankly speaking she is the only one I like.. I can't sleep... I love her a lot... So please advise me.. Please...
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (27 October 2013):
 I'm so sorry this is so painful for you but you gotta let her go, there is nothing there for you with this woman.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (27 October 2013):
 Are you wasting your time sending her presents?
In one word,
YES.
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A
female
reader, Aunty Babbit  +, writes (27 October 2013):
 Thank you for your reply :)
Please try not feel too bad. You made a mistake, that's what we do from time to time.
Learn from it and move forward.
Please also remember, your motives were not sinister they were driven by your desire for this girl.
Don't be too harsh on yourself but I would back right off if I was you.
I hope this helps AB x
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (27 October 2013):
 she doesn't want to be with you. she asked you to stop sending gifts because she doesn't want to lead you on by accepting them. respect her wishes and stop sending things and stop pursuing her. also, save your money! she isn't interested that way and you will only push her away even more if you persist.
just try to take time and learn to be her friend if you can. if you don't think you can just be her friend, i think it's time to let her go.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2013): okay seriously this is stalking and in all honesty she is more than likely terrified of you. you may have known her for years but you proposed after the third date? oh dear! please see a counselor!
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A
female
reader, R1 +, writes (27 October 2013):
 You should stop, you may think you are being generous, she probably sees it as stalking.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks a lot, Aunty Babbit.
Felt bad..since truths are bitter..
:(
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A
female
reader, Aunty Babbit +, writes (26 October 2013):
You can't buy someone's affection or their love.
You knew her when you were children, you don't know her as a woman.
You can't be "in love" with someone you really don't know, you're just "in love" with the idea, the fantasy of her.
You proposed to her on the 3rd day! Really?
I think she might be put off with how intense you are!
You're sending her expensive gifts, proposing to her and coming on way too strong!
She made you promise not to send her anymore gifts and you broke that promise.
Have you taken a step back and looked at your actions?
You claim to be in love with her, you've proposed marriage, know where she lives and won't leave her alone.
I think this young lady is ignoring you because she may well be scared of you, your attention probably makes her feel uncomfortable and she no doubt wants you to leave her alone.
If you truly do love her, then do as she asks and leave her alone.
If, by some miracle, she does decide that you're the guy for her, she knows where to find you and will let you know.
In the meantime try and focus on the real things in your life. Go out with friends, meet new people, have fun and live your life.
Pining for something or someone that will never be yours is a waste of your time. So try and move forward with your life without her.
I hope this helps AB x
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (26 October 2013):
You don't love her and you obviously don't know what love is yet. That's a good thing because it'll help you get over her. Stop contacting her... There's no reason to continue.
Or you could just start sending her cash, it's up to you.
Next time, don't buy someone gifts who hasn't earned them, otherwise you'll just be buying a gold digger, not a woman who's genuinely interested in you.
To this girls credit, she tried to tell you to stop but you didn't listen.
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